


The boy of two worlds

by KiliDurin



Category: The Hobbit (Jackson Movies), The Hobbit - All Media Types, The Hobbit - J. R. R. Tolkien
Genre: Alternate Universe - Not Related, Angst, Fluff and Smut, Hair-pulling, M/M, Magic, Prince!Fili, See'er!Kili, Teasing, Visions
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2015-05-06
Updated: 2015-05-22
Packaged: 2018-03-29 07:47:23
Rating: Explicit
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 13
Words: 38,363
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/3888148
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/KiliDurin/pseuds/KiliDurin
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Kili has been burdened by horrific visions for as long as he could remember. Death, pain and suffering followed him wherever he went, and they did not stop, no matter how hard he wished they would. His only escape from the reality was the storybook, 'The Hobbit', which he has read so many times he knows every word by heart.</p>
<p>He must have fallen asleep while reading.</p>
<p>There's no other explanation to why he found himself in the ancient halls of Erebor, in the very book itself.</p>
            </blockquote>





	1. Chapter 1

Kili had suffered from the burden of visions for as long as he remembered. They started with the high pitched voice in his head, which would turn into a pounding headache so bad he feared his head would split open. He would be unaware of his surroundings and then... then came the pictures.

Flashes of blood, of screaming people, burning buildings or a laugh in the dark. They were always horrible, always caused tears to fall down his chin, and they always came true.

Sometimes it took a hour, sometimes a day, but what he saw would always happen. People would die just the way he had seen them die.

He couldn't understand the visions and he could not stop them, no matter how he tried. He didn't let people get close to him-- his worst fear was to have a vision that he would see his loved ones die.

The only thing giving him a moment of peace was the book-- The Hobbit. A story about a dwarven kingdom and it's king and prince. A story of a far away place where everything was going well, where there was no pain-- only laughs and celebration, love and marriage.

He had read the book so many times that the copy of the book was broken-- pages dropping out, the back of the book barely keeping it all together. That's the reason he left home that day-- to visit Gandalf's antique book store, hoping he had another copy of the book.

The shop was a run down old place stuck between to coffee shops that liked to put out sale signs at the same time. People would flit back forth between one caffeine high to the next, the little shop with it's old wooden door with the squeaky hinges and the tiny customer bell usually left untouched. Virtually no one, save for the owner, ever seemed to go inside.

Except, of course, young Kili. The old man who manned the counter saw him come in on several occasions. To browse, to read, to hide. At times, Gandalf would see him curl up in an arm chair with tea, bury his nose between the pages of some of the older, classical tales, as if he were determined to fall right through the pages and leave the real world behind.

Gandalf never minded him, even if most days he didn't buy a single thing.

The young man returned today, clutching a beat-up old paperback with frayed edges, and loose pages, to his chest. A well-loved book, as most books should be. It made Gandalf's eyes crinkle a little at the thought of how much this man enjoyed reading.

Gandalf smiled warmly as he always did, expecting Kili to take his usual chair and be lost in the magic of the world he held in his hands.

“Good morning,” he said.

"Morning." Kili greeted, walking over to the counter and slid the book over to the older man. "I was wondering if you'd have a copy of this? It's getting a bit hard to read as you can see." A small smile spread on his lips, finger tracing the back of his book tenderly.

Slightly unsteady hands touched over the cover, the golden etched title faded.

“The Hobbit,” Gandalf said fondly, as if recalling very fond memories. He opened it gently, running the yellowed pages under his thumb. “This is a very happy tale. A very old one at that.”

He turned it over, opening the back to read the publish and printing date, nodding to himself somewhat.

“I remember when this book first hit the shelves,” Gandalf murmured, humming softly to himself. He closed the cover carefully, smiling crookedly. “I might have something...”

He turned then, pulling a set of keys from his pocket and moved to a door behind the counter. He opened it up, disappearing inside for just a moment. He returned with a wooden chest in hand, dusty. Gandalf gently blew it away, carefully opening it.

“Ah, here we are.” The old man said, lifting out an old hard cover. “First print, direct publishing date, revision one.” He placed it on the counter, and slid it towards Kili. “You might find this tale to be a little different than the one you've been reading. But it's essentially the same.”

The book was leather bound, with two leather straps to keep it shut like a journal. Gandalf opened it slowly, revealing the first few illustrated pages of a wizard with a large hat, a company of dwarves. A bearded, handsome dwarven king, and the portrait of golden haired prince.

"Oh my god." Kili gasped, eyes widening a bit as he took in the beautiful book laid before him. He hesitated a moment before reaching out, tracing the cover carefully, like the book might break under his touch.

"Are... are you sure it's alright for me to read this?" he asked unsure, glancing at the older man before picking up the book with care, already trying to decide where to sit and read.

Gandalf laughed softly. “My boy, most would tell you this is a collectors book. Meant for glass casing and display. Honestly, what you're holding is well worth thousands of pounds. Those are hand done portraits on blank pages. Not printed.”

But he didn't seem upset that Kili touched, lifted or looked. In fact, the old man seemed very, very pleased.

“But I will tell you books are meant to be read. Enjoyed, touched, used. There's more of a soul to a book that's loved, rather than locked away. I'm sure Professor Tolkien wrote this to be enjoyed, had it printed to be touched. It will honor me, the person who bought it some odd sixty years back, that you will read it.”

"I will, thank you so much!" Kili was positively beaming, clutching the book against his chest before walking to the armchair he had used every time he read in the shop.

He curled in a comfortable position before opening the book carefully, brushing the curls from his face before losing himself in the handwritten text of the book.

Gandalf watched him for a moment with very fond eyes. Kili was a such a nice young man, excited about realms forgotten, worlds to be unfolded. What an imagination he must have, and a great love for the written word.

“Perhaps he is worthy of something more,” Gandalf murmured, glancing away. He searched his shelves beneath the old beaten up register, pushing aside a very large dusty hat. He touched it fondly, nodding to himself before reaching under it for something. A piece of wood, long since broken off the end of a very trusty walking stick. He brought up into his hands, and held it gently between his palms.

As Kili lost himself in the world of heroism, honor and home, Gandalf began to murmur quietly, the wood growing warm in his hands.

At first, Kili didn't realize anything was amiss. He was lost in the words, taking them in greedily and the more he read, the more he could feel, the more he could see and hear.

He was sure he could hear the dwarves speak close to him, feel the heat of the forges on his skin. Then it felt like something tugged him hard, his stomach dropping and he was falling, falling somewhere white.

There were words flying around him, words he could not read but still knew and he crashed on the ground, losing the air from his lungs.

He coughed violently, pushing himself up on his knees. "What the--" he looked around and blinked once, twice. 

This could not be real. 

He had fallen asleep while reading.

There was no other reason to why he suddenly found himself in the halls of Erebor, breathing in the ancient air.

It would have caused a greater uproar, possibly, if there were more dwarves about. But the halls were empty, glowing with the light of torches and the bouncing gleam of gems. Sharp symmetrical architecture, great pillars that seemed to rise into forever to the dark tops of the Lonely Mountain. There was the sound of voices, foot steps beyond.

The ancient language of the dwarves, westron beyond the huge double stone doors that seemed to tower even the tallest of men.

In the quiet one would hear only the echo of panicked breathing, the scramble of Kili's sneakers as he attempted stand from the polished obsidian floors.

Of course, only to have something sharp press against the side of his neck.

“Do not move,” Came a voice, firm but slightly unsteady. “If you value your life.”


	2. Chapter 2

Kili froze at the press of blade against his skin, his breath catching in his throat. "I-I am so sorry, I don't know what happened, I don't know where I am." Or technically he knew, but it just wasn't possible.

He didn't dare to turn his head and swallowed. "I-I'm not from around here, I was reading and then the next moment I know I woke up here--" He was rambling, he always rambled when he was nervous.

At the other end of the sword stood a dwarf. Regal in his stance, shoulders covered in a thick fur cloak. His face was bearded, hair long and gold, braids clamped with gems and silver beads. Narrowed blue eyes watched Kili with great suspicion, and seeming to widen the more Kili stammered out his explanation.

“Woke up..?” the dwarf repeated. He moved the end of his sword to Kili's throat, making him squeak in presumable fear. The blond seemed bewildered more than angry, face strange. “... You... but you _fell_. From the _ceiling_.”

In fact, the dwarf presumed he would have died from it. He had approached at the sound of something, or someone, hitting the ground in the empty hall to the treasure vaults.

"I...fell?" Kili didn't dare to swallow anymore, not when the blade was pressing against his throat in such a way. "I know this sounds insane but I was reading this book and I... I think I fell through the book."

He turned his head a bit, eyes widening a bit at the sight of the dwarf. "I...wait a minute... you're... you're Fili, aren't you? I-I just read about you in the book." He had read the book many times, and Fili... he was even more handsome than he had imagined the blond to be.

“Book?” Just what book?

The more this stranger spoke, the more the blond seemed confused. There were few recordings of his existence the blond could think of. This man, whoever he was, how he dressed with his odd tunic depicting stranger pictures and letters, was certainly not of Erebor.

And furthermore, likely not of the nearby kingdom of Dale. He was otherworldly in presence, he felt completely out of place.

It made little sense. And Fili didn't know whether or not to run him through.

“Explain.” He demanded.

"Look, I've read this book million times. The Hobbit-- a story about a dwarf kingdom of Middle Earth. I know you. Kind of, at least from what I've read. I know your uncle, and some of the people of Erebor."

He held his head carefully, glancing down at his feet. "I mean look at me, do I look like I am one of your own? I'm not from here, I was reading this book and the next thing I know I... woke up here. This is a dream, there's no other explanation to what is happening."

Clearly, the man was a lunatic.

Ranting, raving, possibly mad. Or that fall scrambled his head instead of broken his bones.

But he spoke of things of this world like he viewed them through a looking glass. His dress was.. what were his trousers even made of? How practical were shoes made with brightly colored laces? Furthermore, what did “My Other Ride Is A TARDIS” mean, and why put that on a tunic?

“If you are dreaming then so am I.” Fili said as he lowered his sword cautiously. “I've seen many men in my lifetime, yet you're strange to me.”

"Believe me, I find you just as strange as you probably find me." Kili replied relaxing just a bit when Fili lowered the blade from his neck.

He turned his head a bit, taking in the details of the hall he was in. "It's so weird... I've read about this place so many times but seeing it like this... it's even more beautiful than I thought."

He looked at Erebor with a sense of wonder and fascination in his eyes, like a child taking in the light of a completely new world.

Still, Fili was very cautious. No one would survive such a fall, not without some kind of miracle. Or magical aide.

This man, whoever he was, had to be some kind of practitioner in the magical arts. Or Fili might have imagined such a drop. But that sound, that hard thud. But no crack of the bones. He saw him fall. And by some miraculous reason, saw him start to stand, as if he were waking up from a nap.

But he didn't seem dangerous. No weapon, no staff. Just strange clothes, wandering eyes, speaking of books and knowing.

Something akin to burning curiosity swelled in Fili's chest, and there were more questions weighing heavy on his tongue.

“Come with me,” Fili said. It wasn't a request. He sheathed his sword.

Kili turned to look at Fili at the command, giving a small nod of his head. He didn't dare to say no and besides, he would get lost in a place like this and possibly run into dwarves that would not be as understanding than Fili.

So he followed him through the halls, his curiosity only growing the further they went. "Where are you taking me?"

Prison cells should have been the correct place for Fili to take him. Leave him there to his madness, until he could be dealt with. Simply falling from a ceiling was no crime, but surely, the king would have demanded he be held for falling in a _forbidden hallway_.

Only guards, royal family, or escorted delegates were to be brought to the treasure vaults.

This man would have been struck down if someone else would have found him, and tossed for dead. A strangely dressed burglar is all he would have been remembered for.

“That depends,” Fili said finally as he walked ahead of his 'captive' to another empty hall beyond a side door, just as wide and intricately carved as the last. “... you say you know things. That you've read them. What do you know of me beyond my name?”

Kili tilted his head a bit, pushing his hands in his pockets. "I know your uncle is Thorin, the king of Erebor. I know you prefer to use your double swords when you fight and I know you prefer having sausages than salted meat."

He shrugged his shoulders a bit. "I know your mother would like you to find a spouse but you prefer to have your freedom and find someone you truly care for instead of having something arranged for you."

Fili found his lips quirking at the mention of how he liked his food, but paused in his steps when this man spoke of his mother, and her wishes for him.

A prince was to marry a princess. Or a baroness, a Lady. He was the heir. He had his duties.

“Any prince can be arranged to marry,” Fili said. “But it's come to pass.” He held up his hand, presenting a band. Gold, carved in the runes of his family. Of her family. “That's an observation you've made, surely...but how you know of my hesitancy...”

That was spot on. Had he given it away somehow? On his face, in his demeanor, how his shoulders tensed at the mention of it?

"I know more too, but I'm not sure if you want to hear them. I mean... they're things I should not know, and knowing them might bring me to a lot of trouble. You might think of me as a spy or something else." Kili replied glancing at the dwarf. 

"All I've done is read the book and as other books, that too tells everything about you, about Thorin, everyone. That's what books do."

Indeed that is what they did. Fili's read more than his fair share of tales, slowly revealing the lives and intentions of the characters portrayed there.

What bothered Fili, was the idea of being a character himself. In some story in another world, wherever this stranger fell from.

It made more sense than it seemed. That, or he was some kind of seer.

The future was meant to remain clouded. Prophecies were omens. They spoke of certainties, of dangers, of things to pass. Fili didn't know if he wish to know his future in detail, and would likely remain happily ignorant. With a certainty that he would take on his duties as the heir to Erebor's throne. His duty to produce heirs himself.

And the cycle would simply go on. As unhappy as the prospect made him, a prince had little say in what could be done about it.

“As odd as you're dressed or how you assume I like to eat, I'm still not convinced.” Fili admitted. “You are odd. If it's true what you say, what you hold in your head is dangerous.”

"I'm aware of that. The more I think of it, the more afraid I am to be honest. This is not my home, this is not where I'm from." Kili said quietly, shaking his head a bit.

"I'm excited to see this, I am, but... I just... want home."

Fili glanced back at him for a moment, seeing the vulnerability on this stranger's face. He seemed uncertain then, honestly frightened of where he was. Far from home, a world, a universe away.

He couldn't imagine what it was like.

Fili hadn't gone farther than the Greenwood. Even if he did stay days away, he always returned to the safety of the mountain. Of the stone halls and glimmering gems.

“You know my name,” Fili said then. “But I don't know yours.”

Kili smiled a bit, glancing at the blond. "It's Kili. My mother was a fan of the book and named me after you... kind of. She changed the first letter."

Fili froze at that.

Kili.

Did his book not mention...?

Shaking his head, Fili looked ahead of them and continued to walk. A strange coincidence. A dwarven inflection over a true name-- still, it belonged to someone he still held dear in his heart.

And this odd man also carried it as an identity.

“I see.” Fili said, his voice calm. He still felt Kili's presence behind him, watching him. He lead the man further down the hall, turning to the more populated areas of the palace.

"Uh..." Kili clearly pulled the shelters around him as they joined the more populated areas, gathering quite a bit of attention. He stood up like a sore thumb, wrapping his arms around himself.

"W-Where are we going?"

Guards gave them suspicious looks, especially Kili and his strange clothes. They stopped and whispered, muttering to themselves, pointing and covering their mouths.

What a sight he was to them.

Fili only motioned for Kili to keep following him, dismissing the guards immediately as they approached. He knew full of who was following him, and didn't need further assistance. Fili doubted he would, considering how the man seemed to shrink shyly on himself, reminding the prince of a young inexperienced boy. Or a shy maiden.

He lead Kili to the base of great stone steps and began to ascend them. Soon enough, he had the guards bade them through he great double doors of the throne room. Down it's massive halls and towering statues of the Durins long since passed, Fili brought Kili before the shining throne of Erebor and the king himself, causing Kili's jaw to drop open.

Oh.

Oh dear.


	3. Chapter 3

"Why did you bring me here?" Kili asked quietly, tugging on his sleeve self consciously.

“Would you rather be in a cell?” Fili asked, brow raised. But Kili only tugged on his sleeves, and fidgeted on the spot.

As they got closer, Fili knelt before the foot of the throne.

“Rise,” came the voice of the king. Thorin Durin, son of Thrain, son of Thror, looked a regal sight. He was draped in blue fineries, thick furs and a heavy crown carved of gold, etched in silver and obsidian sat upon his head. He seemed fierce in the face, but he always had.

“Sister-son,” Thorin began as Fili stood. “Who is this man who stands unmoving?”

At least Kili's head remained bowed.

The king hadn't taken offense to that.

Kili swallowed again, not sure whether he wanted to lift his head or not. Not sure what he dared to speak about or not.

"...Kili, sir. I come far away from home."

He finally flicked his gaze up on the king, breath hitching a bit. King Thorin looked ever more regal and majestic than he had imagined-- he knew that the dwarf could easily hack him to pieces if he wanted to.

Thorin rose a brow at the name. A dwarven name, for a human man seemed very strange. And stranger so how he dressed. He looked over Kili critically.

“And where is 'home' exactly?” The king asked, shifting his armored legs. He was always armored, as if always ready for war. It instilled pride in his people, and great respect beyond wealth. He was certainly intimidating, despite such simple questions.

“He hails from the west, your reverence.” Fili said before Kili could stutter out his explanation. The king would simply deem him mad, or a spy, and throw Kili immediately to the dungeons. “Far beyond the borders of the Greenwood. I come before you to ask that he may stay as my guest.”

It was a lie. A heavy, heavy lie. But Fili's face remained calm despite it.

“The west?” Thorin tilted his head. His eyes flit over Kili once again, from his curling hair to the stranger clothes. He tried to make out the westron on his tunic, if it could even be called as such, and seemed all the more confused by the design. How impractical he was dressed for travel. No packs to speak of.

Still, stranger things came from the west. The Wandering Wizard being one of them.

“What is his purpose of stay, Fili?” Thorin asked his nephew then. “And do not lie to me.”

“I would not lie to you,” Fili said, but the king gave him a flat look. “Not in this context, my king.” The prince smiled despite himself. His mischievous nature was anything to go by. “He brings baubles. Western clothing. Odd fashions. I think Adersha would appreciate them.”

His wife to be.

“I have yet to give her a proper handfasting gift.” Fili said then. “I will have him stay, and craft for me as my guest.”

"Wh--" Kili looked at Fili confused. He couldn't craft. He couldn't do clothes. And he knew the story, Fili would not marry Adersha. He'd find happiness in being the king, not having a wife. He never married.

But Fili didn't know that.

And Kili was not a part of the story.

He was not-- he was not part of the story! The realization hit him hard, and he straightened a bit. What would it mean? What would it change? Would it change anything?

“Very well,” Thorin said after a moment, especially since his shoulders relaxed at the mention of Fili's betrothed. He dismissed his nephew for simply falling in love. After all, the young did whimsical things for their significant others.

If Adersha had a love for odd crafts, Thorin did not question. The Stoneheart family was to be there's soon enough.

It would be better if his nephew and the young lady got along well.

“Go then.” He said.

Fili bowed low, and motioned for Kili to follow him. He didn't look back, knowing Thorin was still watching them until they were out of view.

Only then did he let himself visibly deflate, almost sighing.

“It wouldn't do well for me to hide you from him,” Fili said once they were in an empty corridor. “He would know soon enough, and you would likely be locked away.”

"But I cannot do clothes. I cannot craft, I'm not even-- for crying out loud, I need to find a way to get back home." Kili replied with a shake of his head.

“You don't have to do anything,” Fili laughed then. “No. I have Adersha's gift. Uncle-- the king, he has no say in how it's crafted. You don't need to give him progress. He won't ask. It was the safest route to go.”

Or he would see Kili executed. This poor, confused, lost madman. Was it pity Fili felt? Or the name that associated a fond face? Smiling eyes, curling hair, dark locks and toothless little grin. How this memory hung onto his hands, the ends of his cloak. Fili instinctively closed his fingers, faintly feeling a smaller hand in his.

“Nadadith...” He murmured quietly.

How this man reminded him of a soul long since gone.

“I agree with you,” Fili said, lifting his head slightly to look over at Kili over his shoulder. “You don't belong here. But I cannot let you free where darkness can reach you.”

If the things in Kili's head were true, then Fili would put them all in danger by letting him go. The thought of killing him crossed his mind, but Fili felt his soul was too kind for it. It was a circumstance Kili could not control. That wasn't a cause for execution, and the potential of the danger wasn't a cause either.

They just had to be cautious.

“There's a wizard,” Fili went on to say. “He's due to arrive in Erebor. Perhaps you can speak to him.”

Kili breathed out in relief. Greybeard, most likely. If anyone could help him, it would be him. "I'd like that. I truly hope he can help. Me being here has already messed the story, and I'm not sure what else could happen if I staid for any longer." 

Bad things, probably. Most likely. He could stop something from happening, or start something that never meant to begin in the first place.

It was risky business.

"So... now what?"

“I'll have someone sent to Dale,” Fili said. “For clothes. There's nothing that would fit you here. You...” he trailed off, smiling a little sheepishly. “You scare the women. And a good handful of the guard.”

People never liked things that they didn't understand. Fili heard their whispers out in the grand hall. If Fili could, he would avoid a bigger spectacle than what Kili already made.

“In the meantime, I suppose a room. Settle here. Rest, and remain quiet. I will write ahead to him. Perhaps he'll make it before the ceremony?”

"The cer--" Oh, right. The coming off age ceremony. He had nearly forgotten that. "I hope so. I mean I always imagined that joining a dwarven festive would be amazing, but... this is not what I meant by it." 

He smiled carefully, pushing his hands deeper in his pockets. He just hoped the Greybeard could help him.

*

Clothes were brought from Dale, as Fili had promised. He paid a tailor to keep silent as Kili was fitted for them. Something that didn't hang too much off his body, and for boots to be properly made. He fit in better that way, old clothes and shoes neatly hidden in a chest a long with a few of Kili's other strange belongings.

Still, Fili couldn't help but fiddle with them as they were handed to him to be placed away. A leather strap with a tiny clock face on it. It ticked and moved and displayed numbers that blinked. Another strange device, small with a bright window with even smaller pictures on them. He touched it in fascination, turning the strange object in his hands.

He nearly dropped it when it started to make the strangest sound. It startled the tailor enough to tear the seam of the new tunic Kili was being fitted for, the man yelping in absolute fright.

“What is this?” Fili asked, holding it up. The tailor seemed shocked the prince hadn't tried to “kill it”.

It appeared the prince had tapped the music icon on Kili's phone.

"Oh no, don't break it!" Kili protested shifting closer despite the needles stuck on the cloth which hung around him. He picked up the phone from Fili's hand, looking at it surprised. He hadn't thought it'd work here.

"It's... how would I explain it.... It's a device we use to call other people who are far away from us. You pressed the button to turn on the music. It's... like an instrument which we use to listen music from. You can do a lot of things with this."

The tailor wrinkled his nose at the mention of 'music'.

“That's music?” he said, bewildered. “It sounds like a bat out of Mordor.”

Fili laughed at that. “This is what the people of your world enjoy?”

"Compared to your flutes and drums, I suppose it sounds a bit weird." Kili admitted smiling, pushing the phone and watch back into the pockets of his own clothes that he left by the bed. They would do him no good there, but he did stick a piece of gum in his mouth, chewing thoughtfully.

He hoped that the Wizard could help him out of here, before something bad would happen to him or the others.

He blew out a bubble of gum thoughtfully, shifting when the tailor needed him to.

Even that gave the tailor a bit of a heart attack, and Fili had to hide his amused laughter. He ended up paying the tailor much more for “stress”. And of course, to never speak of anything that transpired in the guest room.

He was an interesting man. And the more he found he carried, from his “watch”, to his “phone” to even the “packet of gum” in his pockets, the more Fili began to believe that perhaps Kili was telling the full truth of who he was.

The prince was fascinated by him. By his world, but he forbade himself to ask. Soon enough, when the Wizard arrived, he would know Kili no longer.

It might have saddened Fili slightly. But this man didn't belong here. 

Kili's things were tucked away safely, his new clothes placed into the wardrobe or on the top of the hope chest at the end of the bed.

It had been a long day for both of them. Perhaps for no one more than Kili. Fili bade him a good night that evening.

“If you have need for me,” Fili said, pausing by the door. “My chambers are across from this room.”

Fili left him for the study.

He wrote a letter to be sent with a raven, bidding him haste.

The faster they could get Kili out of here, the better.

*

Kili was trying to wrap his head around the whole situations, preparing for the bed when it happened. The ringing of his ear, the splitting head ache that threatened to split his skull. He fell on the ground gasping, clutching his head as new images filled his vision.

Fili laughing, enjoying the celebration of of a wedding, his own.

But... Fili didn't wed.

Not in this story.

The image burned away, and the sound of a deafening roar filled his mind. Fire, heat, screams. He saw someone being crushed under a pillar of stone, he saw dwarves fleeing left and right.

He snapped his eyes wide open, his skin pale and clammy with sweat. Each vision felt stronger than the one before, leaving him out of breath.

"No... no this is wrong..." He stumbled up, nearly crashing through the door as he searched for Fili's chambers.

The crash was the first thing Fili heard. A stumble through his doors, and he was on his feet, reaching at his side of the sword he already removed. But he relaxed a little at the sight of Kili, the man stumbling through.

Clutching his head, tears fresh on his face.

“Kili?” Fili moved to him as he fell, taking him by the shoulders. The man seemed to be in great, overwhelming pain, teeth gritting as he fought back whimpers. “Mahal-- what happened? Are you ill?”

"It's wrong, it's all wrong." Kili sobbed wiping his eyes desperately, staring at Fili with wide eyes. "This was... this was a happy story. This was something I could enjoy reading, a story about love and family."

He shook his head a bit, gripping Fili's hands tightly on his own. "There's-- there's a dragon, a dragon is going to attack us." he started pacing around the room, tearing his own hair.

"I-I'm not sure when, could be in a hour, or a day, but it's... god, so many died, I saw so many die..."

Fili watched him with slightly widened eyes, listening to him as he went on. It was clear to see whatever this was, it upset him greatly.

Fili reached for Kili's wrist as he paced, stopping him in his tracks. He looked up at the man, Kili's face streaked with tears. He was sobbing still yet, pain evident on his face. This anguished him, Fili could see it in his eyes.

“My friend,” Fili began soothingly, taking hold Kili's hand. “Be at peace. There are no dragons here. There haven't been any in hundreds of years. Their time has long since passed.”

"No! You don't understand!" Kili yanked his hands free, running them through his hair frustrated.

"Ever since I was a kid, I've seen things. Horrible things that would become reality very soon. I've read this story hundreds of times and there are no dragons in it! Now I saw... I saw him, I saw him burn this place, take over it because of the gold. I saw dwarves _die_ , Fili!"

The blond could only watch as Kili continued to break down, heartbroken, crushed. It was as if these happy tales kept the peace in Kili's head, laden with a dozen more secrets, but caged in the beasts of vision.

Fili didn't understand. He couldn't begin to.

“Kili,” Fili worried his bottom lip. “In my tale... what happens to me? Can you tell me, what do you remember?”

Kili turned his head a bit, staring at the dwarf through his tears. "I... your tale, the book..." He wasn't sure if he should tell him. But then again, the story had already changed.

"...You never married. You became a king after Thorin step down, and you were happy like that. You were a loved king and... now it's all changed. I don't know what will happen in the future."

Adersha was never part of his story.

Fili frowned, and found himself looking at the ring on his hand. He had contemplated refusing the offer given by the Stonehearts. Refusing mother, becoming his own person. In fact, today, he was going to take it off, give it back to his mother.

Tomorrow their handfasting ended. Fili was to give his gift, a necklace left behind by his grandmother. It was a glorious jewel, shining with rubies that would accent Adersha's long dark hair. It was an appropriate betrothal present, one picked by his mother. She would wear it during the wedding, and he would do proud by them by taking her as his wife.

Despite how unhappy he knew he would be.

With Kili having fallen into the palace, Fili had completely forgotten about seeing his mother. There was a sinking feeling in his heart, but he pushed it aside.

“Kili,” Fili stepped forward, and took Kili's hand again in comfort. The man seemed to need it. He was trembling. “I may take Adersha's hand but that doesn't mean _dragons_ will descend out of extinction. You might have just had a nightmare.”

The look on Kili's face told him otherwise, but Fili was determined to put the brunet's fears to rest.

“You had a long day. You fell a hundreds of feet from the ground, and survived it. You might just be... perhaps overstimulated?” 

"We'll all die." Kili shook his head, stepping back from Fili. "Your wedding was never meant to happen. Something's changing the story." He whispered quietly, tearing on his hair nervously.

"The joy, the laughter, the music shall fade into screams and smell of burnt flesh." He whispered shaking his head again.

"Don't say I didn't warn you. It can't be stopped, none of the visions can."

Prophecies were an omen. And Kili spit them from his mouth as if poison plagued his tongue, his mind.

It was harder to get Kili to rest after that. In the end, the prince allowed Kili to stay in his bed. But he wept through the night, as if his head were heavy, and he mourned for them although they still breathed.

It worried Fili greatly. Perhaps there was some truth in Kili's words, if it left him so bedridden.

The blond remained quiet nonetheless. He brought a healer to see to Kili's illness, his bouts of pain, but they told him that the symptoms of them were much like the symptoms of the grief stricken.

Kili was certain of what he saw, and he looked at Fili as though he were already dead.


	4. Chapter 4

It was miserable. 

Even if the day was supposed to be about celebration and the dwarves were laughing with joy, cheering for the new couple, Kili couldn't even crack a smile.

In the books, this celebration had been for Fili's coming off age.

Now... it was a betrothal party, one that would end soon. Very soon.

He kept staring out of the windows restlessly, tugging on his sleeve nervously. The tailored clothes were beautiful, framing his body in ways he would not dare to use in his own world but here he fit in rather easily.

He swallowed, holding his head in his other hand. It was nearing, getting close now.

Yet the day was a beautiful one. The guests were kind, the gifts were many, and the delegates from the other visiting kingdoms seemed genuinely pleased at the arrangement. The Stonehearts were a well-loved family, and their daughter was beautiful.

Adersha's long gown, lined with white mink, hair and body adorned with the jewels of her house and the jewels of Erebor.

For a moment, Fili could forget Kili's ill prophecy. He was well to his bride, and she in turn seemed happy by his side.

They danced, Fili's arm around her waist and gently held her gloved hands. She smiled as if all her dreams had come true.

Then the mountain shook.

It was a small tremor at first, almost unnoticeable, even as it knocked down the wine glasses. Another followed, and the musicians stopped playing. The guests then went eerily quiet.

In the distance came the sound of screams.

Kili went completely pale, his heart stuttering to stop in his chest. He ran to the window, pushing his head out just in time to see the large red dragon fly past the mountain, setting the road in fire.

"Dragon." He whispered quietly, stumbling back from the window. Around him the crowd exploded-- dwarves were shouting, screaming, running around in haste to get out. 

But Kili was frozen, covering his ears as he stared out in shock.

It was chaos. Crumbling stone, cries of despair and pain.

Dwarves scattered in their desperation. Pillars crumbled and fell, blocking exits, caging unfortunate souls into the caving ballroom.

There was nothing left to do but to run.

Fili pulled his bride along, urging her to follow him, to stay close. Halls were collapsing, and Thorin... Fili could hear Thorin rounding the guard, anyone who could fight to stand against the beast as it clawed at the barred entrance, held closed by great stone locks and the strength of dwarves attempting to keep it shut.

More pillars fell as Fili kept a protected arm around Adersha's shoulders, the young princess shaking at his side as debris fell atop the stone ceiling.

Fili found Kili shaken among the terror, pale faced and frightened.

“Kili!” He called to him, but the brunet barely heard his cry, and simply looked up in horror at a shadow descending from a above.

Fili's eyes followed it, and he quickly pulled Adersha out of the way of a falling banister, her long veil catching upon the stone. She fell with a cry of her husband's name, crumbling upon the floor as she reached for him.

Fili looked back at her, and heard the creak of two obilisks as they cracked at the bases from the tremors. Kili stood still, and Adersha still reached for him.

In the coming days, Fili would never understand why.

But Fili took Kili's hand instinctively, and pulled the young man out of harms way as the carven stones fell.

Kili felt his stomach drop as he was suddenly yanked away from the spot he had frozen upon, the stones crashing where he had just been and crushing dozens of dwarves under them. 

He nearly fell over, coughing the dust that filled his lungs as he clutched on Fili tightly. 

"I told you, I told you!" He had seen a lot of horrible things happen, but none of them had frightened him as much as this did.

Fili felt a spike of anger in his chest, but it dissipated quickly under the burn in his lungs and the beating of his heart. He pulled Kili with him, and continued to do so, tugging him far over the bridge. He smelled fire, smoke and burning flesh. The charred remains of men, dwarf, and the elves alike.

In the distance he could see the untouched hills, and didn't stop until they reached them, legs burning under the effort, body tingling with adrenaline and fear.

Behind them the mountain burned, as did his people trapped within.

But Kili had warned. Kili warned him, and Fili did not listen.

“Seers are bad luck,” Fili said, voice shaking. “Prophecy has always brought pain. Yet you claimed to know my future, and this has come to pass all because... because I did not give back the ring, as I intended to. Because you fell into our kingdom, I had forgotten. I simply... accepted my coming fate. Is this a fault of my own doing?”

"I-I don't know." Kili replied quietly, shaking his head a bit, eyes wide as he stared at the burning of the mountain. The same mountain he had read thrive, had read of the parties and the joy.

"This was not... this is outside the book. This never happened, I don't know what's going on." He whispered holding his head. "I didn't even see the Wizard... what is going on?!"

Fili had no words for him.

Only blame.

The prince, if he was one still yet, could only feel anger. Destitute in every other emotion but anger. He blamed Kili, he blamed himself.

“Adersha?! Adersha!” came the cry of the Lady Stoneheart as more dwarves moved up the hills, on Thorin's direction. He lead the survivors, face grim and seething. He was shouting in khuzdul, in westron to the surviving men. It appeared the Greenwood delegates were nowhere to be found.

When the Lady Stoneheart found Fili, she grasped him by the shoulders. “Where is my Adersha? Where is my daughter? Please--”

All Fili could do was look away, the guilt heavy in his heart. He didn't have it in him to tell her, and from his silence, the Lady Stoneheart only wept, falling to her knees.

The bride to be died.

She was never meant to be with Fili, so she died.

Kili swallowed thickly, walking to the willow and sunk beneath it, burying his face against his knees. This was a mess. And with the Wizard nowhere to be found, he wasn't sure he could even get home.

What would he do now? Join a moving caravan of men? Find a home in Lake Town? Jesus, that was a weird thought.

The dwarves began to gather as Thorin shouted for them. He had other survivors round them up, to organize the chaos, to calm and pull them together. To tend to the wounded as they could, or to give peace to those who could not survive.

It was grim work. And grimmer with every passing moment. Every hour spent was as if Fili were wading through a terrible nightmare, waiting to awaken from the pain of it all, to wipe the tears from his eyes in the privacy of his chambers, and see to his mother. To see to Adersha. To perhaps give her back the ring, or to... give her the wedding and future she desired. With someone who could care for her. Someone whose fate was not tied to a dragon.

How desperately Fili wished to turn back the flow of time, to correct it. To make the story Kili told him of.

And now they had nothing but the road ahead.

Fili considered telling Thorin of Kili's vision. But it had come to pass now, a catastrophic prophecy brought forth because Fili had decided to lie on the behalf of a stranger who he should have killed, or imprisoned.

Or anything.

 _Anything_.

Fili found Kili sunk behind a willow tree, in the same spot he had been since high noon. The sun was setting now, and soon the dwarves would move.

“What will you do?” Fili asked quietly as he leaned against one side of the tree.

"I don't know." Kili said quietly, shaking his head a bit. "It's.... I suppose I need to find the Wizard... p-perhaps join a caravan, find somewhere to stay with... humans."

He tilted his head back a bit, staring at the orange sky. "I'm probably never getting home."

The grief he held in his voice, either for himself or for what had occurred or both, made Fili feel a little less validated for his anger.

Still, he couldn't shake it off. He couldn't shake any of it off.

“... I threw away the life of my bride to save yours.” Fili said, voice sounding strange. “I... left her reaching for me. What betrayal she must have felt. I chose to save you. A man I had known for merely a day. And I can't...”

Fili couldn't understand it. He couldn't wrap his mind around why. He touched his temple, sucking in a breath to keep the tears at bay.

“... who are you to me, but a stranger?”

"I don't know. I don't know why you did what you did. I'm not part of this story, I should not be here. Yet for some reason I am. I don't.... I don't know." Kili shook his head again, pushing his hair away from his eyes.

There had to be a reason for this all to happen, but what reason, he didn't know. The story never covered anything like this.

There were no dragons in that story.

“There must be a reason. This just doesn't... men falling from the sky, dragons appearing-- Mahal, I can't...” Fili shut his eyes tight, gritting his teeth. His voice was raising. He never rose his voice, never. He didn't want to start now. He took in a breath, and exhaled slowly. “Whatever this is, it's tied to you. I don't know if your visions will return, or if keeping you close to the clan would be a blessing or a... or a curse.”

He pushed himself from the tree. “I am... I'm furious, Kili. Despaired, grieved, but the Stone had me reach for you. There is a reason you're still alive. I chose you, and I intend to find out why.”

"You intend...?" Kili lifted an eyebrow, shooting the dwarf a confused look. Fili could not be meaning what he thought he was.

"You're insane! I can't go with you!" He hissed out. "I know you're mad, heck, I'm absolutely livid about the whole situation. But look at me! I'm a man, and I don't belong with the dwarves. I don't want it, nor am I going to do it."

“So you'd go and find yourself a clan among men who you know little of?” Fili glared back at him. “Out into a world you read of but no nothing of it's dangers? There's more than dragons. Things hide in the dark. There are secrets bound in your head that wouldn't take much torture to draw out of you?”

"And you think I'd be safer with a clan of dwarves who will possibly take me as prisoners if they knew what I know? If they knew what I see?" Kili asked just as coldly, brushing his hands against his knees. "I think I'll pass."

Fili grit his teeth, jaw aching from how infuriating this was. Was it simply stubbornness? On his end or his own?

But Fili saved his life. He threw away the life of his bride, his wife, to make sure this man lived. And for what? To get killed or captured by the dark forces behind all of this?

“You can come willingly with me,” Fili began, swallowing a lump in his throat. “Or I can treat you like a prisoner. Have you bound, gagged, and _dragged_ with us.”

Kili's blood ran cold at the threat, his fingers curling in fists. He hadn't read about this side about Fili. Sure, he knew he was stubborn and sometimes could be a royal pain in the ass, but this was... blackmailing.

"Or I can go to the men, have them recognize me as one of them and I don't thin they'd take it too kindly if they were to see such an act." He hissed quietly, standing up with a quiet huff.

Fili should let him go. Let him run off to get killed, captured, murdered. Let his head be torn open by the dark hands that sought his third eye, his secrets. He knew endings of books and of things not of this world. The dark futures to come.

It was knowledge anyone could use for even darker purposes. Let the world end with it.

Fili's world had ended already, with the fall of their kingdom. Erebor was lost, and he was no longer a prince. Thorin, likely no longer a king. But a leader of a pack of homeless dwarrows. It left a bitter taste on Fili's tongue.

“... Find peace.” The parting was cold.

They were done. This was done.

Fili wanted nothing else to do with him. He spat upon the ground, and left the human to himself.

"I've read about you, but you're nothing like I imagined." Kili muttered glaring after Fili's back. Sometimes it was better to read about someone than actually meet them.


	5. Chapter 5

Fili had returned to tending to his people when there was a shout from a small girl who ran towards them. She tugged on the sleeves of Oin, one of their own healers, pointing in the direction of a small crowd that had gathered.

She tugged the dwarf along, Fili's eyes following. He heard a cry then, familiar and anguished and his heart sank.

*

Drowning, he was drowning. There was someone else in the water with him, someone who tried to grab a hold of him but his fingers kept slipping from the cloth.

He couldn't breathe, his chest tightening until it was bordering on the line of painful, hiccuping sobs escaping his lips. 

Kili blinked few times, his field of vision slowly clearing up and his exhales while still shaky, started to be deeper, lungs sucking in the air greedily.

Oin was immediately at Kili's side once he was able to get through the small crowd. He knelt beside the man, and pressed his hand to his sweating forehead, and felt his temperature with a frown. The man was trembling, looking as if he were pulled from a cold lake.

He took Kili's wrist and pressed his fingers to his pulse, taking in the extent of his rapid heartbeat. He checked his eyes next, pulling down his lids to look.

Whatever he saw there made Oin frown.

Fili wasn't too far behind him, having pushed through the crowd.

“Oin?” He called to the healer, and the old dwarf shook his head. He said something unintelligible. 

"I-I'm fine." Kili tried to push the older dwarf away, but he felt weak, too weak to even barely manage to nudge him away.

He would just need to calm down, just... breathe while he could. It didn't seem like he had much time left in Middle-Earth after all.

“Head-sickness.” Oin said. “Of what kind I cannot say.” He reached into a pouch he carried at his side, and took an herb from it. He crushed it in his hands, and took Kili by the chin, parting his lips. He squeezed the juice in, making the brunet wince and sputter from the bitter taste.

“That should help with pain.” The old dwarf said. “But you will need long term care.”

And from the lot around them, it seemed that he wouldn't be getting much.

“Is your family about, lad?” Oin asked.

"No." Kili shook his head, trying to wipe the vile taste out of his mouth but it was no use. Instead he focused on wiping the tears from his eyes and chin, sniffling quietly.

"It's just me." He muttered standing up weakly, his head pounding unpleasantly. It wasn't like anyone was trying to split it, but it was close enough for that.

Oin shook his head, looking at Kili a little mournfully. 

The dwarf stood then, dusting off his knees. “Elder Bloom. It's a common weed with white flowers, you'll find it. Chew on that to help manage pain.”

He said that as if all he could do was manage it. Fili stopped Oin as he moved to pass him.

“What did you see?” Fili asked.

“...Speckles.” Oin said. “Blown pupils. Uneven. Two signs point to an injury I cannot see. But the speckles...” He lowered his voice. “... seer signs. He could have had a vision. Or he's plagued by migraines. Time and care would tell me more, but our own must be tended to.”

The healer pat Fili's shoulder, and moved back to continue to tend to the former dwarves of Erebor.

Fili wondered, however, what Kili had seen.

Was it again something to do with their people? Was there death and danger ahead? Or something else?

On the ground Kili shook his head a bit to clear it, resting his fingers against his temple before declining his ride with the men of the caravan. He was better of alone, leaving no one to worry about his sudden disappearance or death.

Elder Bloom. Not like the flower would do him any good, unless it somehow granted him the ability to breathe under water.

The healer of the dwarves obviously knew something, he was being secretive even when he returned to his own kin.

Kili glanced briefly at Fili whom still remained, shaking his head a bit. "This does not concern you or your people. You may go in peace. I hope you'll find a place to stay."

“So you're still so determined to keep walking somewhere else?” Fili asked, lips thin. “When its obvious you can't?”

"It doesn't matter what I do anymore." Kili replied with a small smile. "I saw my fate. I don't belong in this story, and just like your bride to be, the fate wipes me off this earth."

“Then change it.” Fili said immediately, his voice cracking. He looked away for a moment, huffing out a breath. “You know these things. They come to you with certainty. I didn't listen to you... I didn't...”

Adersha could have been spared. He didn't love her, but she was a kind, innocent maiden. She didn't deserve that kind of fate.

“And because of that my home is gone. My people are wanderers now. My uncle is... he's holding his head like he still holds a crown. But he's crushed.” Fili swallowed. “... There isn't anything we can do. Everything is uncertain. The future is cloudy, but you can _see_ it. So _do_ something.”

"I can't! How many times do you think I've tried it?! How many times I've arrived too late, or some other act of fate has kept me from stopping things from happening! It _can't_ be stopped." Kili snapped, wrapping his arms around himself for a sense of shelter.

“I can't just have chosen your life for no reason!” Fili snapped back. This plagued him. Oh this plagued him so. His heart hurt for the loss of the mountain, for the loss of every innocent soul. He should have chosen her. He should have taken her hand.

“You can't throw it away now... I can't let you throw it away. Not after everything.” Fili said, voice wavering. “You fall to me and tell me of dragons. And now you tell me it is your turn to die. But I can't let you. I _can't do that_.”

Not again. Not again echoed in his thoughts. He thought of a child's smile, clinging hands and small giggles. 

Fili didn't understand. It scared him, confused him.

“I've pulled you from death once, I can do it again.” He said. “Come with us. Let us find out the reason.”

Fili seeing his death would most likely break the prince. But he knew Fili would insist and insist until he'd agree, so he finally gave a small nod of his head.

"When... when it happens... don't claim I didn't warn you." He murmured quietly. His whole life was a ticking time bomb right now. He could be gone within the hour, or eight hours for now.

“I hadn't yet.” Fili said, and he felt the tension melt from his shoulders. “And after this mess, I doubt I will in the future.”

"Don't blame it upon yourself either." Kili replied with a shake of his head. "No matter how it's going to happen." He sighed glancing at the dwarven company briefly. "We should go."

Placing blame was the easiest thing Fili could do. On himself, or others. Nowadays, it was starting to become a problem.

Sighing heavily, the prince nodded, and motioned for Kili to follow him back to the dwarven camp. He would have to speak to Thorin before the travel would begin.

A little off from the main camp, Thorin stood alone by a small fire, keeping vigilant watch with the dwarves that could help. He was in a foul mood, it was easy to see. Grief, and anger. More so as he stared over the borders of the Greenwood.

Fili took Kili to him nonetheless.

“The sun sets and the fires are still burning inside the mountain,” Thorin said roughly. “Balin tells me they will burn for generations as the dragon sleeps inside.”

Kili gazed upon the mountain, tugging on his sleeve once again nervously. Perhaps if he wouldn't have come, if he hadn't opened that darn book in the first place, none of this would have happened.

He couldn't offer any words of consolation-- he had lost his parents, but he had never lost half of a kingdom.

“Uncle,” Fili began.

“We are to travel to the west.” Thorin said. “I have sent word to the Greenwood. Our... they will not help us.”

That certainly attributed to Thorin's obvious fury. But he kept it well hidden behind a stone hard mask. Thranduil, Lord of the Woodland Realm, had never gotten on well with the Sons of Durin. The bad blood between them ran deep, deep enough to not give aide, even when it was obviously needed.

Fili didn't need anything else to add to his bitterness. So he tried not to think about it.

“Uncle,” Fili said again, and Thorin's shoulders sagged.

He looked to his nephew, frowning at the sight of Kili being with him.

“If we can speak with you.” Fili said. “Privately, please.”

Thorin considered them both for a moment. Kili's nervous stance, and Fili's troubled gaze. He dismissed the men with him with a wave of his hand.

“Very well.” Thorin said. “Speak.”

Kili cast a look at Fili before he sighed, running a hand through his hair. "Why the fuck not, 'm going to die anyway." He muttered with a shake of his head, focusing his gaze on Thorin before telling the same story to him he had told Fili.

About his own world, and the book he had read so many times. About his fall in, about his encounter with Fili and knowledge of the world he was in and the people within it. About his visions, about the pain, the dragon and the fact that the story had changed and even he had no clue where it would go now.

It wasn't Fili's story to tell. And Kili told it tiredly, as if the experiences made him feel stretched. Old.

Thorin listened, nonetheless. To every word, expression unreadable.

“So you lied to me,” Thorin said to Fili.

“I had to,” The blond frowned. “About this, at least. You would have cast him away, and I felt... it was right. I didn't know, uncle, I swear. I didn't know about his visions until... days before.”

“And you saw no fit to tell me?” The former king scowled. “So that this can be prevented? So that we could have prepared?”

“Uncle, there's no preventing it. Kili... he...” Fili trailed off, sighing softly. “He tried to warn me. I didn't listen. I thought he had a nightmare. Oin confirmed that he might be a seer.”

“Prophets are omens,” Thorin said gravely. “And you would bring him here? Have we had not enough ill fortune, nephew?”

"The prophecies cannot be stopped. I already told Fili, no matter what you try... they find a way to come true anyway." Kili shook his head a bit, glancing between the king and his nephew.

"Besides, I'm only here to give him a peace of mind for as long as I can." Kili replied, crossing his arms against his chest, casting his gaze on the ground. "I saw my own end coming. A hour, luckily few, and I'm gone. It's a bit ironic. I always dreamed about being here, experiencing this for real but this..."

Had been a nightmare.

On both of them. For all of them that stood out in the cold without homes. With little food, no assurance and a bleak future.

“There was nothing we could have done,” Fili said then, voice quiet. “But I saved his life in the mountain. He tried to save ours, and I...”

Thorin shook his head. “A human in our caravan would leave the people ill. Food and medicine should be for our people.”

“Let me care for him,” The blond's head snapped up. “Half of my rations I will share it. I will find the herbs he needs if he falls ill. I just... uncle, I believe he can help us. I won't let him die.”

“Then he is your burden to bear,” Thorin frowned. He didn't seem happy about this arrangement. “But speak nothing of this. You will frighten them needlessly. I need our heads on straight. I need the sick tended to. We will march through the paths, and you.”

The king turned a cold stare to Kili. “... will pull your weight.”

"Oh my god, what part of 'I'm not going to be here in few hours' don't you understand? Save me from the stubbornness of the dwarves!" Kili exclaimed frustrated, not understanding why the two were arguing about rations and medicine.

Few more hours and he'd be as good as dead.

He shook his head before turning on his heels and walked back to the caravan, shifting on the sidelines for a moment before finding his place helping few of the families tie up their bags on the carts.

He was so convinced, it seemed, of his fate. From what Fili had seen, Kili had every reason to be.

But he couldn't let him. Not like this, not now. Not in a few hours or even a few days. Still, Kili worked where he could. He helped the families, he gave food to the hungry. He seemed incredibly fed up with Fili's presence.

And Thorin's ever hard stare. Watching, as if waiting for Kili to drop cold as he said he would.

But a few hours came. A few hours went.

They slept restlessly, and rose at the break of dawn.

The camp was ready to move. The human caravan had left, and Kili was the only one that remained. The dwarves were a little suspicious, of course, as they always were. But Kili still helped. He gave food, blankets.

But at least seemed less irritable.

“You're still breathing,” Fili said as he watched Kili come back. He had lit a pipe, puffing smoke, as he parted the meal he promised to share into two clay bowls.

"I'm not breathing out a sigh of relief yet. It hits you when you least expect it." Kili replied glancing down at the dwarf, hugging the furs he had got from one of the thankful families. It was warm and a bless, the night had been surprisingly cold and he was not used on such weather conditions.

He kept up with the small talk during the day, sometimes with Fili, sometimes with a random dwarf. He didn't even try to speak with Thorin, no sir.

The king terrified him.

It wasn't until they reached the river they would have to cross through the bridge that Kili tensed up, gaze fixed on the deep water as his throat closed up.

The caravans passed through, though narrowly. The river was too deep to float, and the animals seemed skittish by the sound of the water rushing. 

Fili paused by Kili's side as he stared out over the wide river, expression odd, shoulders tense. He seemed pale.

“Alright?” Fili asked.

No, no he was not alright.

He wondered which way it would happen-- would the bridge collapse? Would a sudden wave sweep him away? Would he slip and fall over the edge?

Instead he swallowed and nodded, giving Fili what he hoped was a reassuring smile. "Just fine. I think you should go first though." 

If the bridge broke, he didn't want Fili to be swept with him.

Fili frowned then.

Kili was behaving peculiarly. But the caravans passed through without a problem. The bridge seemed sturdy, the ropes strong. No heavy wind nor rain to slip on. And the river was too far below them to get wet.

All the dwarves had passed by before them. Thorin was at the other side. He called Fili's name, and made a motion for them to move. The king didn't seem to have enough patience to wait. He wanted to get to the edge of the Greenwood before nightfall.

So Fili moved to the bridge, and calmly began to cross, pausing to give Kili one more odd look. The brunet merely made a motion for him to keep going, seeming fidgety.

Shaking his head, Fili moved forward.

In the end, the reason of his fall was none of those he had thought it would be. One of the dwarf children had wandered too close to the edge, trying to reach down in the water for something they had seen.

Without thinking, Kili swept in and hoisted the child up and away, pushing her out of the way. The rope snapped under his weight, and for a moment he was falling.

He was aware of someone shouting-- the horrified look on Fili's face before he crashed under the surface. He wasn't sure which way was up and which was down, his chest tightening as he curled in a small ball.

The currents were strong, pulling him under, knocking him against the sharp rocks of the bottom. They hit him on the chest, knocking the breath out of him which escaped in burst of bubbles past his lips.

His vision swam, growing hazier and darker by every second yet he felt no true fear. Surprisingly... calm, in fact. The cold numbed him, and he stopped fighting.


	6. Chapter 6

It was stupid.

Thorin would drill that into Fili's head if he survived. Or ever saw him again. All the shouting in whole of the world still wouldn't have stopped him.

It was terribly familiar. Water. Deep water. A younger him who didn't know how to swim. Only to cry and scream for his amad. Nadadith disappeared in the water. Nadadith sank too far and Fili couldn't reach.

Fili lost his grip, and those small hands slipped.

So the prince dove. He swam deep, the current pulling him down and he reached, Kili's body blurry in the waves below. He clawed for his wrists, his hands, the clothes, allowing himself to be sucked further and further down with the man who didn't even fight it.

Kili was so certain of his death, of his visions. He gave into the cold embrace of the water.

But Fili fought it. He grasped Kili tight at elbow, kicking them up as they were swept to a calmer spot at the bottom. Eventually, the river spat them back up, Fili gasping for air as he fought for shore.

Kili coughed violently, each inhale of air burning like the fire of the dragon. He shivered, clutching on Fili weakly, aware of the hands pulling both him and Fili back on the shore.

He was turned on his side to cough out the water from his lungs, aware of someone patting his back, of someone speaking to him but he could not make out the words.

They lay on the bank, attempting to catch their breath, Fili spitting out a bit of water plant he caught in his mouth. He made a face at it, before laying heavily on his side.

Luckily, they hadn't been swept too far down the river. Dwarves were resourceful folk, helpful and hardy, and didn't forget those that helped them. Blankets were brought immediately for both the prince and the shaken human. Oin was on them like a fly to horse dung, immediately calling for a stop for care.

Of course, as predicted, Thorin ripped into Fili for his stupidity. His voice calmed however, when he saw his nephew and heir was mostly all right, save for a few scratches on his arms from the river bed.

A fire was made, and they camped again on the other side of the bridge. 

“Strip off your clothes,” Oin instructed. “I won't have fevers on either of you. It's only been a day.”

Fili didn't protest that. He was already stripping from his drenched clothing, his waterlogged boots, laying them out by the fire to dry.

When Kili was a little more coherent, the prince couldn't help but grin.

“Still breathing,” He said.

Shivering, sore, but breathing. Still alive. Kili got a heartwarming thank you from the dwarven children's parents and the child herself, allowing her to push the daisy in his still wet hair before sending her off with a smile.

He sat before the fire undressed from his clothes and wrapped in bundles of blankets, trying to warm himself up.

"You shouldn't have done that. Why did you even... you make no sense at all."

“I know I shouldn't have. Thorin screamed that loud enough, I still hear it.” Fili said, peeling his wet tunic over his head. He shimmied out of his trousers next, shaking out his hair.

“But I told you,” The blond's lips quirked. “I won't let you die.”

The last thing to go was the underclothes, dropped nonchalantly near his boots. He wrapped the blanket around himself, shifting it over his broad shoulders.

Kili averted his gaze from Fili's body back to the fire, closing his eyes for a moment. "Why?" He murmured quietly. "I don't understand _why_ you would do such a thing. You owe me nothing."

“I don't get it myself,” Fili said honestly. Another dwarf brought them warm clay mugs full of an herbal something. Probably tea and medicine, to prevent colds.

He took it gratefully, and thanked the dwarf, who bowed to them and left them be.

“But I think I'm starting to,” Fili said, looking at the rose colored liquid. He smelled sage, and something floral. Probably to mask the taste. Sipping it, he shuddered, tasting sweetness and the bitterness of whatever medicine Oin crushed into it.

"Well that makes one of us, because I have no idea what's going on anymore." Kili replied with a shake of his head, taking a small sip from the cup and made a face at the taste.

God, he hated herbal drinks.

A shiver ripped through his form and his teeth clattered together as he brushed the curls from his face.

“Being in your shoes, I'd be lost to.” Fili admitted. He rest the mug between his palms, and crossed his legs beneath the blanket.

“... did your book ever say anything about my family? Beyond my mother, father, uncle?” Fili asked, staring into the fire.

Kili turned his head a bit, casting a soft look at the dwarf. "...It mentioned a great tragedy which took a young life of the family." He replied carefully.

"Your... brother, maybe?" He added unsure. "The book didn't go to much details, I think it went something like: "There was no feast on that birthday, no boy to clap his hands together in time with the song. For the nature had given and the nature had taken, and a young life of the Durin's line had fallen."

Fili licked his lips, and nodded slowly. He brushed a lock of blond hair behind his ear.

“We were very small. I was a boy, so you can imagine having a younger brother was... I felt older. But as a child, you want to feel older. You want to be responsible, trusted. And mine was for him. Amad...” Fili glanced up towards the trees. “Amad always told me to hold his hand. Always. Because he could get lost. For a whole year I wouldn't let him go, because I was terrified he would disappear.”

Looking back at his mug, Fili tilted the liquid, swirling around the remains of herbs at the bottom. “Uncle convinced me that it wasn't in a literal sense. But I scarcely believed him. And he... held my hand anyway. Without prompting. He loved to explore, and he loved holding onto me as he did so but I was supposed to practice letting him wander. But not too far, just... you know, I can't hold his hand until he's old and on the verge of death. But there are days I wish I had.”

Fili closed his eyes, and he heaved a breath. “I did the one thing amad told me not to do. I let him slip from me.” He looked to the brunet. “Men nadadith-uh. I cried at the edge of the pier. I couldn't swim. He was gone.”

He looked to Kili then. “You told me your mother named you after me. Just changed a letter, but it seems wrong. If you know my story, know his too. His name was Kili.”

Kili blinked once, twice, lips parting a bit. "...The book never mentioned the young Durin's name. Not one single time." He replied quietly, frowning towards the fire.

Weird.

Really weird.

And it seemed like the young dwarf had drowned as well, which was... a freaky kind of coincidence.

“Whether you feel I owe you nothing, I think it lies beyond the name.” Fili said then. “Your eyes remind me of his. Wide and full of wonder, when you first arrived. Before all this... it might have very well been just that. Perhaps its why I took your hand. Because I couldn't...”

Fili couldn't do it the first time.

"I don't know." Kili replied honestly, shrugging his shoulders a bit. "I'm sorry I remind him though. It must not be easy." 

Fili shook his head. “It's not that the memory gives me pain.”

At least not until recently. More of a determination. A motivation to do right by someone he lost. Of course, only to wrong someone else.

He didn't know where his guilt lied heavier.

“You say all your visions come true,” Fili said, looking to Kili. “And you saw your death at the bottom of the riverbed, I assume.”

Kili nodded after a moment of hesitation, brushing a finger absently through the damp hair. "I saw myself choking, felt he cold grip a hold of my heart and squeeze until I could no longer breathe."

Not a pleasant experience and definitely not something he would want to feel again.

Fili stopped him from dying in the river, but now what? Would he have a vision of his death in another way? Or would he even get a vision and instead just... have a heart attack and die? 

At this rate it could be highly possible.

“Sooner or later death will come,” Fili agreed with that at least. “But it doesn't have to be in some gruesome vision.”

He finished the tea with a shudder, placing the mug aside. It was growing colder, and he pulled the blanket tighter around his body.

“If I can help you, I will.” The blond said. “I'm not... completely at peace as of yet. I feel as if your purpose here is bigger than my personal coping.”

"If you come up with any ideas, you're more than welcomed to say them out loud because I have no clue why I'm here." Kili sighed placing his own cup away, not able to drink more than half of whatever herbal liquid it contained.

He tugged the blanket tighter around his body and shifted closer to the fire, rubbing his hands together.

People simply didn't just fall from the sky. Dragons didn't just descend. There was a purpose behind everything, there had to be. Fili believed it to be, the Valar and Mahal instilled that in him. There were reasons things happened, whether for the good or the bad, there was something.

They sat by the fire in silence for the most part, a dwarf occasionally coming by to add more wood to the fire. Food was brought, and as usual Fili split his rations.

Above them Fili could hear the flutter of wings. He looked up at the trees to see a dark bird sitting there. The raven tilted its head, bouncing on his legs before fluttering down beside Fili. It carried something in its beak.

Fili took it gingerly, unfolding a small scroll.

“This is the letter I wrote...” the blond blinked. At the bottom was a small scrawl, clearly not his own. “The Wizard replied.”

Late of course, which might have explained his absence at the wedding ceremony.

But it was a simple message. One that piqued Fili's curiosity.

'Take him west' was all it said.

Kili turned his head at Fili's words, shifting closer so he could take a peek at the written words on the scroll. "West?" He echoed quietly, frowning a bit.

West held mostly the city of men. Why would the Wizard want him to go there? "Perhaps he waits for me there." He muttered tilting his head back a bit, worrying his lower lip between his teeth. "How many days travel is it from here to Rohan?"

“Weeks. Months.” Fili said. “We'll likely be passing through. I don't know if Thorin wishes to risk the mountain passes. And he... would not want to cut through the Greenwood to get to them.”

The paths would be safer under the watchful eye of Thranduil. But the bitterness was clearly there, the pride. Thorin would not beg, but he wouldn't risk his people either. A rejected message and a tossed plea was enough to fill the king's heart with loathing.

Kili nodded slowly, closing his eyes for a moment. "Suppose I'll travel with you then, at least until we reach Rohan." 

And there, their paths would most likely separate.


	7. Chapter 7

Dwarves were not nomadic by nature, so the traveling took a toll on their numbers. Oin did what he could to save the lives of the elderly and the sick. But with the coming cold, and the few places to find warmth, many of them did not survive.

They mourned their dead on tired legs and weary hearts. Songs for the passed were sang as they trudged through great open space, and a mother wept for a child she lost to the bitterness of the oncoming winter.

They stopped at a small village, the men suspicious of a sudden caravan of dwarves.

“Never seen no more than two and a few shaggy ponies,” muttered a farmer to a stable hand. “There's a good hundred of em'.”

“Are they an army?” asked a frightened young lady.

“One in the front looks like a general,” the farmer pointed to Thorin. “But there are children...?”

The news hadn't quite spread about Erebor, it seemed. Thorin had no choice but to share their story. He got little pity.

They seemed reluctant to trade. More reluctant to share the food they stored but once Thorin bartered things of value, rings from his fingers, necklaces given by the women, they were better at offering supplies and repairs. The use of a barn, and blankets.

As long as they kept to themselves.

The first of the snowfall started that night, and Fili had traded the fine silks he kept for warmer clothes. He stood outside after the sunset, watching the flakes as they fell, powdering shed trees and the roof tops of warmed homes.

There was so much death and sadness that Kili's heart _ached_ for the dwarves. He helped where he could, but he quickly figured out that he could not wield a weapon like them, nor could he hunt like the others. 

So he stuck with the women and children, helping them with food and clothes and consoled them when a child was lost.

And the whole time, he felt guilty.

The town of men made his shoulders relax a bit, and as one of their 'own' so to say, they were less hostile towards him. He used that to help their company get more food and blankets.

But still, his mind kept drifting to the Wizard. Could he truly help him back home? And once he got there... the what Would he dare to read the story anymore?

The only good thing that had happened to him during their travel was that he hadn't had a single vision after Erebor. There were no sudden catastrophes he saw, no deaths in that sense.

The absence of omen was a blessing at least, but their fortune was still foul. If Thorin believed Kili brought them such poor luck, he said nothing. He hadn't spoken to the seer, only to Fili if he concerned him.

“He does well to learn to mend clothes,” Thorin said to Fili as he joined him to watch the snowfall. “But the women are well with their hands on that.” Most of them were crafters, if not hunters and former guardsmen. “The children, as well, can repair stitches. There aren't enough hunters. I need skilled hands for fur. For food.”

“He's clumsy with a weapon, uncle.” Fili shook his head, lips quirking a little. “He can't hold a sword, and I'm very sure he can't tell which end goes in the hide.”

“You were just as hopeless as a dwarfling,” Thorin rose a brow. “I was as well. It takes practice.” He presented the blond with a wooden bow and a leather quiver of arrows. “I need hunters. I need warriors. If he's with us, train him.”

Fili took the bow, and only inclined his head as he was used to. Thorin nodded back, and left him to his peace.

It was dawn when the duty was given to Fili. Three other hunting parties were set out, and Fili was to take Kili on his own. He brought Kili the thickest mink coat they had, as the human shivered more violently than they.

“I assume you don't do well in winter,” Fili commented, seeming amused.

Kili shook his head a bit, wrapping his arms around himself as he followed the blond deeper in the forest. "From where I come from, we have very mild winters." He explained blowing out a mist of breath.

"I hate to be so negative, but you've seen me use those weapons. It's a waste of time, they're not my thing at all."

“I've seen you use a sword.” Fili said once he buckled his boots. They were out then, weapons and a pack of supplies attached to the blond's back. He had Kili carry a smaller pack containing the day's rations and water. They would be out the entire day looking for game.

“Let me rephrase,” Fili cleared his throat, grinning slightly. “I've seen you drop a sword. Cut your finger on a dagger, poke yourself with a pocket knife, and trip over a shield. You've never quite used them, you see.”

"And shouldn't that tell you enough that I'm not fit to use weapons in the first place?" Kili asked lifting an eyebrow, tugging on his gloves before following Fili deeper in the forest.

“Bows are different,” Fili said with a half shrug, smiling cheekily as they walked over snow covered brush. “Nothing like a sword or dagger. And you'd do poorly trying to use it a shield. Not enough to block with, you see.”

"So you're giving me a bow?" Kili asked tilting his head a bit, ducking under the bush so he would not get snow under his clothes.

“It's the only thing you haven't touched and hurt yourself with,” Fili said, pushing a branch aside. He let Kili move pass him first, before letting it go.

“It's a good assumption that maybe this might be the weapon of choice for you. You're lean, agile.” The dwarf flit his eyes over Kili's form. He took Kili's hand then, turning over his palms. He pressed his fingertip at the center, dragging it up Kili's middle digit. “Long fingers.”

The prince grinned up at him. “I'm also wearing the coat you mended. Detailed stitching. You have good eye sight.”

Kili flushed lightly, offering the dwarf prince a small smile in return. He couldn't deny the growing attraction he felt towards Fili-- but it was probably just the fan inside of him throwing cartwheels because he was actually meeting him, living with him for the moment.

"I suppose so, but don't say I didn't warn you when I accidentally shoot myself or you."

“I doubt you'll fumble that much,” Fili chuckled, looking over the brunet's face. Probably flushed from the nip of winter. Still, he couldn't help but think the color dusting his pale cheeks kind of... well, adorable.

He let Kili's hand go after a moment, clearing his throat. He probably held it for longer than what was considered appropriate.

“Come on then,” Fili motioned for him to follow.

"No? You saw me with the swords, right?" Kili laughed shaking his head before following Fili again, the two of them walking in comfortable silence until they found a clearing passable for them to train in.

The bow felt heavy and weird in his hands. Kili's brows furrowing a bit as he lifted it up.

The target Fili set up was a piece of board from the barn, nailed into a tree. He showed Kili first how to hold it, how to properly notch, but the brunet was odd in his stance still yet. Awkward in how he held the bow.

Fili, being as small as he was in comparison, had to stand up on a nearby log. He helped adjust Kili's stance, placed his hands on his hips to fix how he stood.

“Don't stick your elbow out like that,” Fili said adjusting Kili's arm. “Pull your arm back.”

"Easy for you to say." Kili muttered amused, letting Fili correct the position of his arms before rolling his shoulders and relaxing a bit, allowing them to be pulled back.

His first arrows flew way past the target, each snap of the string making him flinch slightly.

Fili laughed softly, much to Kili's dismay. He felt the brunet glare at him a little, but Fili only smiled back.

“That was good,” he said with a crooked grin. “You didn't shoot yourself.”

"I didn't shoot anything." Kili pointed out with a soft huff, rolling his shoulders before trying again.

The fact that Fili was behind him, hands on his waist and body close to his own was rather... distracting.

“No. You didn't. You missed, spectacularly.” Fili said in agreement, and Kili only huffed again as he notched another arrow. He helped adjust his aim again. “Don't close one eye. Keep them both open. Focus on the target.”

He adjusted Kili's hips again, hands firm on his waist.

Kili nodded in understanding, notching his arrow again and fought to keep both of his eyes open. He stared at the target, his arm trembling a bit the longer he kept the position until he finally released the arrow.

It didn't miss, but technically it didn't hit the target either. He hit the bark of the tree, huffing quietly.

“Excellent,” Fili said, eyes crinkling with mischief. “If that were a buck, you would have shot right between the horns.”

And likely scare any other game nearby completely ball-less after sending it scrambling.

Kili didn't look to pleased by this praise.

“Try again,” the prince said.

"Do I have to? I'm useless, Fili. I cannot do what you do." He muttered lowering the bow with a shake of his head.

"I don't know how to use a weapon, and I don't know how to hunt."

“I didn't either, once.” Fili shrugged. He helped adjust Kili again, coaxing his arms back up. He leaned close to Kili's shoulders, helping him draw the bow back, steadying his aim.

“The point is to keep trying,” The blond said quietly. “Even if it's hard. Even if it hurts.”

Kili sighed quietly, knowing that Fili would not let him be so he allowed his arms to be rearranged back up. "I'm not even from here. I don't have the same blood like the people from here, I don't have your skills of survival."

“That's why you're going to learn them,” Fili said pressing his chest against Kili's back, gently holding the brunet steady. “So you can fend for yourself, if that time ever comes. Both eyes open.”

He repeated the advice close to Kili's ear.

“Let it go.”

Kili blew out a slow breath, keeping both of his eyes open. Fili was a solid weight against his back, his hands steady on his own and breath hot against his ear.

He relaxed slowly, fingers curling tighter on the string before he released it and the arrow pierced through the target.

“Bull's-eye.” Fili laughed, giving Kili a wide grin. “See? Effort paid off.”

With help, but it was a start. A good one, a great one.

“We'll make you an archer yet,” the prince said, patting Kili's shoulder. He moved from his place on the log, landing heavily on his boots.

Kili beamed, pushing the curls behind his ear. He couldn't believe it, but he had truly hit the target. He had shot it.

He continued to practice, Fili correcting him whenever he slid away from his position. For hours he shot, until his skin was sticky with sweat, his cheeks flushed and fingers nearly bleeding from the strain.

But he evolved quickly, most of the arrows hitting the target instead of missing it.

Watching him, Fili couldn't help but grin a little. Kili seemed to radiate with joy, despite his exhaustion, the exertion from effort to keep practicing. He got better with each shot, and was starting to steady on his own.

Kili seemed happy with accomplishment, at getting this right, at being good at something.

Fili felt proud of him. And when they sat for a break Fili lit a pipe, leaning against the base of a thick tree with a thick fur cloak lain out over the snow. He reached for Kili's hair, and ruffled it.

The same way he had to his little brother, all those years ago.

Kili laughed at the ruffling, nudging his elbow against Fili's side before reaching for the back. Instead of taking something to eat, he took the slim stripes of fabric and wrapped them around his fingers, over the raw spots the string had torn open.

"Thank you. Without you, I'd given up a long time ago."

“You've got fire in you,” Fili blew smoke through his nose, smiling softly. “A little encouragement to let it burn hotter, that's all I did. The rest you did on your own.” He nodded towards the target, riddled with arrows, many chipped from the center of previous shots.

“I'll have some gloves made for you,” he said. “Proper ones, for hunting, so you don't fray your fingers to the bone when you shoot. I'll teach you how to fletch your own arrows, carve the heads. You'll be shooting rabbits between the eyes yet.”

"I still couldn't have done this without you." Kili pointed out smiling, brushing a curl from his eyes once he was done patching up his fingers.

He glanced at the blond and the sweet scented smoke he blew out, inhaling deeply. It reminded him of fresh fruits, of forests after rain and something... something really sweet. Addicting ever.

The prince was aware of Kili watching him, specifically as he smoked, taking in the exhaled air.

“Mountain Roc weed,” He said. “Grows on the side of the Lonely Mountain, where Rocs nest. It flowers once a year, sprouts berries. More of a strange vine, but we call it a weed.”

The prince chuckled. “It's spicy on the tongue. But the burn is calming. Relaxes the muscles.”

Fili held the pipe aloft, offering it to Kili.

Kili had never really smoked. He didn't want to die because of lung cancer or something like that. 

But things were different now, and he truly wanted to see if the weed tasted as good as it smelt. So he took the pipe carefully, bringing it to his lips and took a slow drag.

Of course he ended up coughing a bit, the taste of the weed strong and sweet on his tongue but surprisingly pleasant.

Fili laughed as Kili started to cough, patting his shoulder.

“I choked on my first smoke too,” he said. “Threw up on Thorin's shoe, actually. I was twenty.”

He took the pipe back. “The trick is to just breathe deep, hold, then exhale... it takes practice. Burns going down. The smoke coming out is smoother than it going in.”

Fili sat up on his knees, and motioned for Kili to lean closer. “Sword instructor helped me with this. Open your mouth a little.”

Kili looked at him confused and curious but shifted a bit closer anyway, tilting his head a bit.

The taste of weed was still strong on his tongue and he tried to swallow it down, coughing once before focusing on the prince before him and parted his lips as asked.

“Remember. Breathe deep, hold, exhale.” Fili said, smiling lazily.

Fili took the pipe between his lips, inhaling the smoke and held it. He placed it beside them, sitting up on his knees to touch Kili's face. He leaned in, eyes half-lid, tilting his head and gently blew the smoke between the brunet's parted lips.

Even if he had had some kind of idea what Fili would do, it still caught Kili by surprise as his face was cupped and Fili leaned close. He inhaled out of instinct, the taste of the smoke softer this time.

It was a pleasant warmth that had his eyes darkening a bit and going hazy, his exhale being nearly lazy as he blew out the smoke between their lips.

“Easier, right?” Fili murmured grinning slightly, staring up at Kili from beneath his lashes. The brunet's eyes were misted over, his cheeks flushed from the cold. Or the warmth from the smoke, the blond wasn't sure.

They stayed like that a while, slowly taking in the remaining wisps that lingered by their lips. Their closeness, strangely, made Fili's heart pound.

Sharing smoke wasn't something that was supposed to feel so intimate. Fili had done this before, with several other dwarves. Sword instructor, a fellow in a tavern. An exchange in breath to feel the stimulation provided by dried weed.

But Fili felt something coil in his gut, almost making him shiver.

“Want another?” The prince asked, his voice barely above a whisper.

Kili could only nod numbly, tongue poking out to lick his dry lips. He couldn't explain it, but he felt like the first time he had been drunk. His thoughts did not run straight, and he found himself nearly giddy from their closeness.

Seemed like otherworldly weed was strong to him.

Taking the pipe back up, Fili took in another deep breath. He held Kili's face still, feeling the human's body relaxing, almost completely listless.

Holding the smoke the blond moved in closer, lips barely brushing Kili's as he exhaled slowly, the brunet breathing it in through his parted mouth. Fili could feel Kili's own breath hot against his lips, sweetened by the weed, mingling.

His inhale was slow as he enjoyed the slightly spicy taste of the smoke, a soft hum escaping his parted lips. The more he drank of the smoke, the headier his thoughts became, the more relaxed he started to feel until he was smiling widely.

He exhaled just as slowly, breathing most of the smoke back in Fili's mouth, eyelids fluttering shut.

Dwarves had sturdier resolve it seemed. With alcohol, perhaps not so much. But affect of the weed was something Fili got used to a long time ago. It took smoking ounce after ounce before he could feel beyond reach.

It seemed Kili was easily lost in it, practically slumping against Fili, humming in the calming pleasure of it.

“Alright?” Fili murmured, hands on Kili's neck. His body grew warmer as the drug took effect.

"Mmmmh." Kili smiled at the question, nodding his head. "Feel calm." He replied obviously relieved, glad to not be thinking or worrying even for a short moment.

“Good.” Fili grinned a little. Kili seemed unsteady, and unable to properly keep himself sitting up. The blond shifted then, laying back over the furs below them. He let Kili rest over his chest, head on his shoulder.

The prince dumped the burnt ash into the snow, effectively putting it out.

It would take a while to pass through Kili's system. Leaving him sleepy, warm, and maybe a little sensitive to touch. Fili was careful where he placed his hands, despite how silky the brunet's skin felt beneath calloused fingers.

Fili looked up above to the treetops, the sky above whitened with thick clouds. But it wouldn't snow again as of yet.

The steady beat of Fili's heart under his ear helped Kili relax even further, and he curled closer to the dwarf. His arms encircled the tiny body easily, but he knew that in strength Fili would beat him easily.

" 'm not crushing you, am I?" He asked tilting his head up a bit, nudging his nose against Fili's jaw.

“You're very light,” Fili said, fingers touching the ends of Kili's curling hair. He tugged on them gently, letting them bounce back into place. He gently scratched at the nape of Kili's neck, fingernails scraping slowly over his scalp.

Kili's breath hitched at the scraping, his skin rising on goosebumps before he swallowed. The fingers left a burning trail on his skin, making him keen quietly as his own fingers curled against Fili's chest.

“Sorry,” Fili mumbled, pausing his touch. He moved his hand back to Kili's shoulder. He took the quiet whimpers and the slight squirm for discomfort, even if the soft noises sounded so...

The prince closed his eyes, letting out a low breath.

"It's alright. Felt nice." Kili murmured flexing his fingers a bit before stretching lazily, blinking owlishly at Fili's braids.

He pulled on one of the mustache braids, smiling a bit. "I always had this... clear image in my head how you looked like. You're nothing like that." He chuckled, letting the braid drop. "You're even better."

“Oh?” Fili responded, smiling slightly as his braids were lightly pulled. His face felt a little hot from the compliment. “Am I then...?”

He turned to look at Kili's slightly flushed face. The brunet was smiling, either from his own elation or the effect of the Roc weed, he wasn't sure. Perhaps it was both.

“You aren't too bad yourself,” the blond murmured. “For a human, anyway.”

"Always thought I'd be a dwarf if I lived in Middle-Earth." Kili admitted smiling, tilting his head back a bit. "I felt more connected to them than any other race. Too bad I stayed a human." He shrugged his shoulders a bit before settling down again, drawing idle shapes on Fili's chest.

"...You look adorable when you blush." He snickered after a moment.

This plant was known for making people exceptionally... cuddly, if that was the word for it. Fili could recall lazy love making under the influence of the drug, heightened senses, impossible to fight urges to giggle, and warm completion that left his body feeling as if he were floating.

And now Kili was touching him, tracing patterns, sensitive from returned touch.

Fili willed his face not to darken further. But the look on Kili's face told him he did not succeed.

“Humans aren't terrible,” Fili said once Kili settled fully against him. “I don't think it's terrible. That you're human. You are better than most I've met.”

"Still wish I had been a dwarf." Kili replied with a shrug of his shoulders, resting his palm against Fili's chest before sighing.

He liked this, it was warm and lazy and for a moment he could forget that a whole world existed outside the bubble they laid in right now.

"...It's not much longer before we reach Rohan."

“It isn't,” Fili agreed. “Another week, maybe, or longer if the snow persists.”

It was thick now, blanketing the ground white, seeming to glow in the midst of the dreary light. Hopefully luck would be on their side, and the blizzards would hold off until the next village or town that would give them even a remote bit of shelter.

Fili began to feel oddly sleepy with the man tucked so close. He touched Kili absently, once more running his fingernails over the soft skin of his neck.

He felt Kili tremble slightly, and heard the sound of his quiet whimpers. If the blond remembered correctly, being touched in that state was a little torturous. Nerves tingling, skin growing hot. But Kili felt so soft beneath his fingers, he couldn't bring himself to stop playing with his hair, fingernails gently scraping his scalp until his cold nipped cheeks flushed dark.

Kili's breath caught in his throat, head tilting a bit, pushing against Fili's hand with another soft noise. His fingers curled on Fili's coat, tugging slightly as his breath started coming out in short puffs of air.

“Alright?” Fili murmured.

It was clear he wasn't, and of course the dwarf prince wasn't helping in the least. He eased his touch nonetheless, gently tugging the ends of the brunet's hair.

Kili nodded his head, he was alright, more than alright. He tilted his head back at the tugging, fingers clenching on Fili's clothes. "I-I'm fine."

“If you're sure,” Fili chuckled, turning to watch Kili's face for a moment. He was a handsome man, for a human. Sharp nosed, sharp brows and pouting lips. His cheeks were scarlet, mouth parted as he let out short puffs, tempting and teasing the rising urges for the prince to nip.

Fili closed his eyes instead, taking in a deep breath before exhaling slowly. He rest his forehead against Kili's, nudging his nose against the brunet's.

“Rest,” He murmured. “You won't be able to do much until the feeling passes...”

Kili chuckled quietly, shaking his head a bit. "I don't want to rest, I'm not tired." He murmured amused, nudging their noses together in response.

Fili laughed softly at those words, shifting slightly. He placed a hand on Kili's cheek, stroking his cheekbone with his thumb.

“Then what can I do to make you tired?” he asked, grinning a little as he pressed in a little closer. Their lips brushed briefly as he spoke, voice quiet, low.

"Mmmmh." Kili hummed thoughtfully, eyelids fluttering slightly, head tilting to lean in the touch. "I have a feeling you already have an idea."


	8. Chapter 8

Here in the open, air cold, bodies warmed by the drugging effect of the Roc weed, Kili was probably not in the right state of mind. But he was looking at Fili from beneath thick dark lashes, teasing his mouth with his tongue, a flicker of desire in his dark eyes.

It made Fili's breath hitch. He swallowed thickly, the sudden wash of warmth and arousal coiling in his lower belly. He kissed Kili's plush lips softly, briefly tasting the remnants of smoke.

“I just might,” The blond whispered, voice growing husky. He nipped Kili's parted lips, tugging them gently. “If you keep tempting me like that...”

"I'm not even doing anything." Kili pointed out slightly out of breath, fingers curling a tighter hold of Fili's shirt. He leaned close, returning the brush of lips against Fili's own.

“You're doing enough,” Fili chuckled, running his fingers through Kili's hair. He kissed him again, soft pecks over warm lips. Slow at first, gentle, lazy prods of the tongue between teeth. He could taste the sweetness of the plant on Kili's palette, the lingering ash from the pipe.

The kiss was sleepy, but no less intimate, fingers curled into the fur of his thick coat, hands tangled in soft curls. 

Kisses were languid, a little clumsily returned. Kili's mouth was unbelievably soft, lips pliant beneath Fili's, tongue slick and silky, tentatively brushing over his own. The prince touched with sure, gentle hands, brushing back Kili's hair, petting the soft skin of his neck, gently nudging aside furs to tease his collar.

They parted for breath, lips pink from soft suckles, wet from taste.

Kili could easily get addicted to this, which should have been the first warning bell that something was not quite right. He would leave soon, their paths would part and he probably would never see Fili again.

But right now he lost himself against Fili's lips, sucking in a sharp breath as the other teased his neck and throat with his teeth. His fingers twisted in Fili's hair, head tipping back exposing more of his skin for the prince.

Kili's skin tasted of salt, and cool like freshly fallen snow. He smelled of rain and lavender, natural scents mingling with earth and smoke. Fili breathed it in deeply, kissing a tender trail to the base of Kili's throat.

He was euphoric, nearly as drugging as the Roc. But sweeter, better on his tongue, filling Fili's mouth, his lungs. Fili moved his hands to Kili's coat, pushing aside the thick material, pulling up the layers that shielded his body from the cold. Fingers pressed over the skin of Kili's furred belly, the muscled jumping against his palm.

A small gasp tore its way through his lips as he was exposed to the cold, the noise soon transforming into a quiet moan as Fili's warm fingers traced the skin.

His muscles twitched, fingers curling tighter in the blond hair before yanking Fili's head up and capturing his lips with his own.

Fili kissed him back, eyes a little widened at Kili's sudden urgency. The prince relaxed into it however, pushing his tongue between Kili's lips, sliding the muscle against the brunet's, feeling the gentle pressure of suction as the human drew him in.

The prince's hands wandered still over Kili's hot surfaces, gently dragging blunt nails over his waist, the bumps of his ribs hidden under warm cotton and mink lining. Fili felt over the contours of Kili's chest, nudging his nipples with his thumbs.

He felt the man start to shiver, either from cold or sensation or both. Still, Fili longed to properly undress him.

Fili groaned slightly as Kili pulled on his braids, his thick hair, dragging nails leaving goosebumps in their wake.

“Kili...” Fili murmured his name against his mouth, taking in heated moans as he continued to play with the brunet's chest. He tugged lightly on the nubs, rubbed them firmly with his thumbs and fingers until the man began to keen.

What endearing sounds he made, how his moans made the blond shiver with arousal.

“I'd taste you here,” Fili whispered. “Kiss them, if I could.”

Kili licked his lips, fingers trailing and tugging Fili's hair, scraping his skin wherever he could dip his fingers past his shirt.

He latched his teeth on Fili's neck, biting above his pulse, groaning against his skin. "W-What's stopping you?"

The answer was lost on Fili's lips as Kili bit at his neck, tilting his head back with a low moan of pleasure. It left him blank for a moment, relishing the feeling of Kili's teeth and tongue on his skin, sucking marks into his skin.

He felt Kili's desire then. It ran deep, hungry, beyond the feeling of the drug. It made Fili wonder about Kili's hero worship of him, the admiration for a character who did not exist outside the texts of a story book. The thought was strangely elating, probably more so for Kili, now that he could feel him, and be desired in return.

Fili licked his teeth, curling his fingers into Kili's hair, gently drawing him back. He smirked a little.

“You're overdressed.”

Kili relished on the moan he had managed to draw from Fili's lips, more than happy to see the dark bruise take form on the prince's skin and barely managed to hide a smirk when he was pulled off.

His breath caught in his throat, fingers twitching a bit as he stared at the blond coyly. "Are you going to do something about it?"

“Cheeky,” Fili chuckled. He caught Kili's lips again, kissing him deep as his hands continued to roam. He stroked the skin hidden under layers of clothes, only withdrawing them to pull on the straps holding Kili's clothes together.

He started to undress the human, peeling away the layers to reveal pale skin that started to flush from winters' cold. Fili wasn't sure if he shook due to his hands or the heat of touch, of kisses over his exposed body, breath ghosting over sensitive skin.

The prince had shed his own coat from over broad shoulders, pushing away clothing between sloppy, desperate kisses to Kili's mouth, his neck and collar.

But Mahal it was also freezing.

Licking his teeth, he pulled from Kili briefly, pushing away the weight of the pack they carried off of the furs. It was large enough to pull over them, shielding their bodies from the cold air.

Kili had started to doubt their idea, the cold of the winter penetrating through the pleasurable haze. Not even Fili's hands were enough to keep him warm, and his skin had soon turned pink as the cold bit him.

He was more than relived once Fili pulled the furs over them, kissing his neck in a quiet thank you before undoing the rest of Fili's clothes. He pressed himself up, breath hitching as their bodies slid together, the warmth of it making him groan happily.

It wasn't the best cover, but it was warm, and their body heat had only attributed to the rising temperature as they were finally able to touch. Bare skin against bare skin. Fili kissed at Kilis neck, dragging his teeth over his throat, and licking the trail soothingly. He suckled at the base, worrying the skin until it reddened.

Fili gently pressed his hands to Kili's shoulders, slowly moving atop the man, thighs on either side of his body. He sat upon Kili's stomach, arousal pillowed over his heaving belly. He took a moment to admire their differences. While Fili was broad, smaller, Kili was a little long-limbed, lean, with fur lining his chest and navel. The prince found himself touching the soft hairs, hands running over the contours, every bump and dip.

“You're beautiful,” Fili murmured, looking at Kili from beneath his lashes.

Kili's cheeks flushed at the sudden compliment, gaze averting and focusing on the way his hands slid up Fili's chest, mapping the muscles.

"...So are you." 

Smirking slightly, Fili slid his hands over Kili's chest, down his stomach, petting over the twitching muscles. The blond leaned closer, placing a soft kiss at the dip in Kili's clavicle, peppering a feather light trail over silky surfaces. He kissed Kili's nipple, gently drawing the nub between pouting lips, teasing it with the tip of his tongue.

The furs on top of them obscured his vision a bit-- it was not completely dark, but still dim enough for him to really squint so he could make out the expression on Fili's face.

A soft gasp slipped past Kili's lips, body arching closer against the dwarf's wandering hands which in turn sent shivers down his spine. His fingers twisted in the blond hair, holding him close to his skin with a pleading noise.

Kili was sensitive, and that was easy to see. Was it the effect of the drug simply heightening his senses, or the way he naturally reacted to touch?

Either way, Fili was entranced by him. The soft keens, and silent begging as he tangled his fingers into Fili's thick hair. The smell of his skin, how smooth he felt beneath the flat of his tongue.

The prince groaned slightly as Kili's fingers curled against his scalp, making him shiver visibly. His head tingled from it, the gentle tugs and the urgency in the brunet's arch making Fili press a little closer.

“Kili,” Fili breathed his name, ghosting heated breath over warm skin. He placed another sound kiss over the nub, gently tucking it with the tip of his teeth.

The way Fili shivered didn't go unnoticed, Kili's lips curling in a small smirk as he twisted his fingers in the blond hair and tugged lightly again. He smoothed through the mess of locks, brushing a kiss on his forehead.

His breath hitched as Fili nipped his nipple, back arching a bit, adam's apple bobbing as he swallowed. "F-Fili." The name felt familiar yet not on his tongue, the feel of hands on his skin causing his eyelids to flutter shut.

By the gods, how Kili moaned his name. So sweet on his tongue, even sweeter to Fili's ears. His mind was starting to feel foggy, almost drunk off the small pleasures found in Kili's touch.

The blond lapped over the nub again, listening raptly for every hitched breath and needy keens. It made Fili's heart pound, fresh arousal pooling below his navel. Kili's body was starting to feel warmer between his thighs, and the prince could feel every sharp intake of breath, the rumbling in Kili's chest as he moaned.

Mahal, he felt good.

Fili gave the nub one final kiss, then focused his attention on the neglected. He kissed there a little more roughly, sucking it hard.

Kili's back arched with a broken moan, his mind swimming pleasantly -- he wasn't sure whether it was the weed or the way Fili treated his body, but he knew he didn't want it to stop.

Everything felt a tad lighter, warmer and pleasurable, fingers tugging and scratching against Fili's scalp as that seemed to get him reactions out of the prince.

Fili swore under his breath in the dwarven tongue, eyes closing tight as Kili pulled his hair. He rolled his hips against Kili's stomach, cock nudging up against his belly, a small pearl of precome dabbing against the skin.

The prince left another wet kiss on the human's chest, tongue darting beneath his pectoral. Fili panted heavily, worrying his lower lip as Kili gripped at the hair on the back of his neck. Fili leaned his head back, exposing his throat, his own fingers digging at the soft skin of Kili's sides.

Gorgeous, that was the only word running through Kili's mind. Exposed like this, Fili was like the most gorgeous feast he had ever set his eyes upon.

With a hungry noise, he pushed himself on his elbows, sinking his teeth on the exposed neck, marking the skin with a soft keen. His fingers tightened their hold of Fili's hair a bit, massaging and scratching his scalp before pulling on one of the braids.

Another string of curses left Fili's lips at the tug on his braid and the pressure on his neck. He grasped at Kili's shoulders then, letting out a shuddering gasp and another heady moan.

“F-fuck K-kili...” Fili panted, moving his arms around the human's shoulders. He grasped at the muscles of his back, the bump of his shoulder blades. 

It interested him, the tongue Fili spoke in and he shuddered at the _raw_ sound of it. Kili licked his lips, pressing them on the prince's neck, worrying the skin with his teeth and tongue.

His fingers massaged for a moment, easing the sensations before digging them back deeper, scratching his skin, tugging the hair and winding them around his fingers.

Oh, this was undoing him. Fili felt himself start to tremble, the sensation of Kili's pulling and playing with his hair clouding his mind. The lips and teeth on his neck, marking him, leaving him pleasantly sore, knowing he would be bruised. The prince swallowed thickly, blunt nails dragging over the brunet's back.

Fili dug his hands into Kili's soft curls then, gripping him there as he took in another broken breath.

“If you aren't careful,” Fili panted. “I'm going to fall apart on you...”

Kili's breath hitched as Fili's fingers sunk in his hair, holding on tight enough to have him whimpering, hips jerking up a bit on their own accord. "I-I think that's the point?" He asked cheekily, curling his fingers on the base of his hair before pulling slightly, tipping Fili's head back, pressing his lips back on the skin.

Fili let out another choked noise, hips rolling against Kili's belly as the brunet continued to suck at his neck, fingers pulling at his hair, nails digging into his scalp. His mind had nearly blanked out from the rising pleasure, the heat of Kili's mouth, the pressure of his teeth and silkiness of his tongue.

The blond's skin started to flush from the combination of sensations, and soon Fili found he was lost in it.

Kili watched him with rapt attention, licking the adam's apple slowly, teasing it with his tongue before sliding one of his hands down to rest against Fili's waist. His other hand staid in Fili's hair, teasing him even further, lips trailing a path to his ear where he proceeded to suck on the ear lobe, panting heavily against it.

He was aching now, cock twitching against Kili's stomach. Fili fought his urges to rut, to press, but gods he couldn't keep very still. He was squirming in the brunet's arms, shoulders trembling as he grasped at Kili's back, his curls.

Fili moaned his name between soft pants, shuddering as he rolled his hips a little more firmly.

He felt himself growing closer with each touch, every kiss and nip to his skin. The tingling feeling at the roots of his hair had the blond near keening himself.

“Please-- “ Fili gasped.

Kili bit harder on Fili's shoulder, the sound of the other keening and pleading sending heat through his body in a hot waves. His fingers gripped a tighter hold of the blond hair, curling and tugging, forcing his head back before bucking his hips up.

"I thought prince's didn't _beg_ ," He breathed out sucking on the dwarf's earlobe, tugging it with his teeth.

A broken sound left Fili's mouth, hands clutching at the human's shoulders at the sudden movement. He could feel Kili's arousal just barely teasing him, the tip brushing against Fili's perineum. And gods, Kili was merciless with his touch to his major erogenous zone, lips hot on his ear, his neck.

“Y-You would have me on my knees,” the prince panted. “Mahal-- please Kili, _please_ \--”

Kili groaned, hips jerking up before he tore his lips away from Fili's skin to suck in sharp breaths of air. His hand traveled down, heel of his palm pressing against Fili's cock, rubbing it slowly.

Taking pity on the prince, he undid the laces of the prince's trousers, slipping his hand inside and wrapping his fingers around his erection. Thumb swiping over the head, he keened at the feel of precome leaking down and he spread it further down.

Fili cried out something unintelligible, whether it was english or dwarvish, one wouldn't know. It was a word lost in bliss. Kili's fingers were hot on his member, the organ throbbing like a beating heart against the brunet's palm.

The prince was positively leaking, tip wet with the moisture of precome, glans exposed fully through extended foreskin. He was thick in Kili's hand, hard and sensitive from the human's touch. 

“K-kili...” Fili moaned helplessly, hips jerking slightly. “Please I'm almost-- I n-need-”

Kili hushed him gently, pressing his lips on he racing pulse on Fili's neck as he worked his fingers over his cock.

He never wanted to forget this.

The way Fili looked like, so beautifully lost in his pleasure. The desperate tone of his voice, the way his body reacted and arched towards his own.

It all had Kili nearly going blind with lust towards the blond, thumb rubbing against the wet slit. "Do it, want to see you lose it, want you to come--"

The prince mewled then, the noise broken and almost utterly pathetic in sound. He was shaking, thighs trembling against Kili's side as he babbled quiet pleas. The brunet touched him tenderly, strokes firm and quick, building pressure that had Fili jerking clumsily over his palm.

Pleasure overtook him, every single sense sending his nerves alight. Fili's mouth hung open in a silent scream, breath broken as he heaved, hips stuttering forward as Kili milked out his essence, cum spilling in thick ropes over the human's fingers.

“Kili...” Fili near sobbed his name, grasping tight at the man's shoulders, neck, fingers digging into his curls. 

Kili bit on his lower lip hard enough to draw blood, watching the way Fili fell apart, how his body lurched forward before wetness spread over his fingers. His breath hitched, fingers continuing to milk the prince until he was sure he had got everything Fili had to offer him.

Carefully he pulled his hand free, pressing a kiss on Fili's cheek before bringing the fingers close to the blond, smearing his cum over the parted lips.

Not giving him time to think about it, Kili leaned forward catching the prince's lips with his own, cleaning them with slow swipes of tongue.

Fili eyes were misted over with pleasure, the sensation of the brunet's tongue lapping leisurely at his own left him moaning slightly. The prince pulled him closer, latching his mouth onto Kili's lips, catching his tongue and sucking.

A burst of bitterness and salt washed over Fili's palette as he drew the muscle between his teeth. He held Kili there, tasting him greedily, until they both yearned for breath. The prince broke away with a gasp, tucking himself closer to Kili's chest, attempting to regain composure. But he was still trembling, the lingering feeling of climax leaving his cock half hard, twitching still yet.

Fili ran his fingers through Kili's hair, looking up at the man. He smiled slowly.

“I thought I was to tire you,” the blond said, chuckling.

"Seems like the roles were turned." Kili chuckled brushing his fingers tenderly through Fili's hair. For a moment he worried he had tugged too much, but the blond showed no signs of discomfort or pain so he relaxed with a breath.

"Everything alright?"

“Yes,” Fili nodded. “My scalp will be a little sore later, but I feel very, very good.” More than good. His thighs burned from the effort of his unsteady thrusts, a little like his bones were reduced to jelly. It was an amazing feeling.

He was slumping against Kili's frame, fully pressed into the brunet's lap. He shifted slightly, still feeling the evidence of the man's arousal. The blond licked his lips.

“It seems you aren't quite alright,” Fili grinned a little. He sat up a little straighter. “It must be painful for you.”

After all, the prince had spent his time working up Kili's heat. And the brunet took more from the sight of Fili's pleasure. Gingerly touching the brunet's face, Fili gently rocked into him. Kili was so hard beneath him, likely weeping and aching from neglect.

The blond wanted to please him at the start, and Kili only saw fit to draw pleasure from Fili first, leaving him basking in the aftermath of ecstasy. No one had made him feel that way, nor made him come so hard.

“You were so good to me just now,” The blond murmured, drawing the man closer. He nipped Kili's lips, lowering his voice in a husky whisper. “How I long to please you...”

Kili's breath stuttered out, eyelids sliding shut as his lips parted and he returned the nip playfully. His hips jerked up, pressing himself against Fili and he whined quietly.

He could feel the precome staining the inside of his briefs, sticking on his skin in a way he knew it'd be a bitch to clean off later.

"G-God... you're more than welcomed to satisfy your needs." He replied tracing his fingers up and down Fili's neck.

“My needs are met,” Fili said with a soft laugh, shivering a little at Kili's touch. “I feel quite good. You, however...”

Fili pressed his lips to Kili's briefly, gently nibbling him. “If I had the right oils, I would have you properly, with your legs tight around my waist...” the blond licked his teeth, looking at Kili beneath thick lashes. “Or you could lay back as I sit on your cock...”

The blond traced his fingertips over Kili's jawline, grinning lazily. “As it were, my hands and mouth will have to do...”

Oh god.

Kili shuddered nearly violently, breath catching in his throat as he stared at the blond hungrily. God, he wanted all of that and even more.

Which was probably very selfish of him.

He wasn't even sure if this was a one time thing only.

Pushing the thought to the back of his mind, he claimed Fili's lips once again, continuing to rock his hips against the other's. "Whatever you wish to give me."

Fili found it was a lot. Every desire Kili had, he wanted to meet it.

Perhaps again, in a proper bed with silky sheets and thick pillows. Where they could both be completely bare, no bit of the body left untouched or kissed.

“Lay back,” Fili whispered, “Let me take care of you...”

Kili nodded slowly, letting his fingers slide up Fili's hair before laying down on the furs slowly. They felt comfortable against his back, tickling slightly as he shifted.

It was nearly hot under the furs, and he knew it'd be a torture to get dressed and return to the outside world.

Fili smiled slowly, running his hands over Kili's neck and shoulders, following his touch with gentle pecks over soft skin. He didn't have to do much to work Kili into a state of heat. The man already lost in warmth, in growing pleasure and aching arousal. Still, the prince took his time, peppering soft kisses over Kili's stomach, tongue dragging over the droplets of cum left on his skin in the aftermath of Fili's own core shaking climax.

Deft fingers hooked under the hem of Kili's trousers, drawing them down over the bones of his hips. Fili pressed a gentle kiss just below the brunet's navel, slowly tracing the tip of his tongue at the junction of Kili's thigh and groin.

Each slide of tongue against his skin made it rise on goosebumps, fingers digging on Fili's back. He hadn't thought the prince would be willing to use his mouth on him yet, but he was not going to tell him to stop.

The promise of pleasure had Kili's body trembling in anticipation, half lidded eyes staring at the blond.

Fili was slow with kisses, pressing his mouth over the softest spots of his his stomach, gently nipping, softly pulling at the skin with the tip of his teeth.

He purposely avoided the one place Kili needed him most. At least for now as he teased the skin, listening for the desperate noises, taking pleasure from the way the brunet gripped at his back and shoulders. 

Gently, Fili pressed his lips to the warmth of Kili's sex, breathing in the musky scent of his arousal, the precome as it dribbled out from the moist tip. The prince peppered feather-light kisses over the underside, from the base of the brunet's swollen sacs to the corona, and swiped his tongue over the leaking glans.

When the lips finally pressed against his skin, Kili's head tilted back with a quiet keen, fingers sinking in Fili's hair. "G-God... please..."

How sweetly he begged, voice quiet, body trembling, rocking back as he sought more of Fili's attentions. The blond kissed Kili's cock, eyes closing as he savored the feeling of his skin on his tongue. Fili lapped up the main vein, and again over the wet head, teasing the slit as it twitched, drooling more of Kili's promised essence.

Almost agonizingly slow, the prince took the end into his mouth and began to suck lightly.

Kili keened at the surge of pleasure that shot through him, fingers tightening their hold of Fili's hair-- still mindful that he would not cause the prince any unnecessary pain.

Fili's mouth was hot and wet, causing his hips to jerk a bit before he forced them to stay down. It was pleasure unlike anything he had experienced before, his lips parted in shallow breaths, skin flushed.

The prince moaned a little around Kili's cock, bringing him a little further into his mouth. Fili placed his hand flat on the man's belly, splaying his fingers over the soft, furred surface as he instinctively swallowed.

Slowly, Fili started to bob his head, his lips and tongue dragging over the shaft. The act was by no means clean, near sloppy as the prince practically drooled around him. Licking, swallowing, fingers wrapped around the base, stroking languidly.

Kili's head dropped back, lips parting in a desperate noise of pleasure as Fili's hand pins his hips to the ground. The mouth working around him draws his pleasure slowly to new heights, his toes curling, thighs trembling a bit before they lock around Fili's head to keep him where he most wanted him.

He was so close, just seeing Fili lose himself to his pleasure, to be able to touch and bring the dwarven prince to his orgasm had been nearly enough to undo him completely, without a single touch.

Fili was happy to stay where he was, carefully working Kili further past his lips until the bulbous head touched the back of his mouth, barely breaching the tight muscles of his throat. He pressed his nose against the coarse hairs, breathing the natural scent. The blond moaned at the feeling of him, mouth full of the man's thick cock, stretching his lips and heavy on his tongue.

The prince placed his hands on Kili's hips, pulling him, encouraging him to thrust.

This was it, this would be that one thing that killed him.

The hands on his hips encouraged him to move, to take more in ways he had not dared to imagine before. He was worried about hurting Fili, his movements slow and cautious at first before gradually picking up speed.

Fili moaned, closing his eyes as tears pricked at the corners of them. He took as much of Kili as he could, fingers digging into the skin. The prod felt good, a pleasant kind of sore that would leave Fili's throat burning and voice hoarse. He could taste Kili's precome on the back of his tongue, felt it dribble warm and thick.

By the gods he wanted Kili to take his pleasure. Needed him to use his mouth, fuck his throat until he felt raw. Fill his mouth, paint his lips. Fili gripped the man tighter around his thighs, burying his nose against the soft skin at the center of his pubis, moaning as if Kili's movements gave him intense pleasure.

"O-Oh god..." Kili threw his head back with a gasp, hips jerking forward towards Fili before he bit on his knuckles to stay quiet.

His thighs trembled where they were locked around the dwarf's head, pleasure pooling and swimming in his lower belly, threatening to snap at any given moment.

"I'm not going to last-- f-fuck going to--"

The way Kili's body heaved, muscles tensing beneath Fili's hands only urged the prince on. He was hungry for it. The heat, the texture, the bitter flavor. And gods, Kili sounded so wanton, so close. Fili found he loved hearing him on the brink of falling, the way his breath would pick up, how his voice broke under pleasurable sensation.

It fueled the embers of burning desire in Fili's core. He found that he wanted more of it. Needed more.

The prince sucked hard then, moving his head in quick short bobs to meet Kili's thrusting hips, near whimpering as the man kept his legs tight about his ears.

Kili's back arched, fingers scrambling for purchase from Fili's shoulders and hair as he cried out in pleasure.

His hips jerked few times as his orgasm washed over him, emptying his release in the waiting mouth of his current lover. His stomach muscles tensed rhythmically, breath coming out in sharp gasps that left him feeling heady.

The sudden burst of fluid had Fili near gagging, fresh tears leaking down his cheeks as he shut them tightly. Kili's virility was thick, musky and almost earthen in flavor, washing over Fili's tongue in short bursts. It filled his mouth pleasantly, falling past his lips as he moved his head.

The prince chased the essence greedily, only pulling off of Kili when he could no longer properly breathe. Even through his gasps, Fili lapped over his lover's cock, suckled the strings of seed off the wet organ like a man depraved of water. He was murmuring praises, babbling them in the tongue of the dwarves, lost in a haze of his own bliss, worshiping Kili's sex with kisses and words the other man couldn't understand.

Kili's chest heaved with each shaky breath he sucked in, mind swimming pleasantly. His fingers trembled as they ran through Fili's hair, gently pulling him up so he could press a kiss on the parted lips. 

He tasted himself on Fili's lips, tearing a soft groan from the back of his throat. "Christ... I don't want to move but I fear we've been gone too long. Won't others be worried?"

Fili laughed lightly at Kili's sudden concern. He kissed the man deeply, running his fingers through sweat matted curls.

“I was to train you all day,” Fili murmured against Kili's lips. “Until sunset...” he ran his hands over the brunet's body, moving in close. He kissed him again, almost urgently, mind misted over in the aftermath of pleasure. 

“And hunt...” Fili panted as they broke for breath. “This was a pleasant turn.” Oh a very, very pleasant turn. The prince didn't think they would have ended up this way, tangled beneath the furs in the middle of a snow laden forest. Kissing, touching, making love.

“Oh Mahal, I might be addicted to you,” the blond breathed.

Kili's mind was yet again hazy because of the hard kisses, and he buried his face against Fili's chest.

The thought of having the prince addicted to someone like him had his heart jumping, a tiny smile spreading on his lips before he pressed them on the pulse on Fili's neck.

"And if we return without any hunt? Then what?"

“Well,” Fili rested his hands on Kili's shoulders, rubbing them lightly. “We'd be counted as the unlucky party...”

As there were others out in different directions.

“But you are right,” The blond said with a soft sigh. He kissed the top of Kili's head. “We can't linger for long. I have to bring back something...”

Even if it wasn't a lot. His people would grow hungry without the meat, or cold without the hide of the game they could be looking for.

“I hope you feel up to a trip deeper into the wood. The plant has most likely passed through your system,” Fili said, licking his lips idly. He smiled cheekily. “Mountain Roc always gave people a unique flavor...”

"Oh so that's why you wanted me-- to enjoy more of the weed." Kili teased back, pushing Fili's shoulder slightly to get him to sit up.

The movement pulled on the furs, letting cold air flow underneath it and causing Kili to shudder and gasp in shock. He was quick to search for his clothes, getting dressed to store some of the warmth.

It was growing later, the temperature dropping a little lower with the passing hour. The heat from the furs escaped them almost immediately when Kili pushed it away from their bare bodies. But Fili was quick to get his layers back on, the wind biting at his skin until it reddened, trembling as they both rushed to dress.

Fili missed their closeness in that hidden space, and more so the warmth of it, and Kili's silky skin. Even with the coat, the prince felt strangely cold.

They packed their things and rolled up their supplies, Fili shouldering the heavier of the burden. 

The blond gave Kili a small smile, and jerked his head in the direction they were to go.


	9. Chapter 9

Hunting wasn't that fruitful, unfortunately. Still, Fili managed a pair of quails, and a small jackrabbit. He had Kili attempt a shot at another bit of small game, and he managed to get a stoat. Inedible, but the fur was almost pure white with flecks of grey.

It was worth something. And how Kili spotted it in the snow was a marvel to Fili. The prince praised him with a pat to the arm, and they returned to the barn where the other dwarves waited just before dark.

This would all go to hell, he was sure of it.

While Fili had assured him that the others were not expecting them to return before sundown, he wasn't so sure what they would say of their return with Fili carrying his teeth mark on his neck.

Oh yes, he saw those. Deep purple or red bruises littered Fili's neck where he had bit down, disappearing under the collar and some hidden behind his hair.

Kili briefly entertained the thought of running away.

Still, he joined Fili on their walk back, carrying what they had managed to hunt back to the camp. The stoat was pulled from his arms as soon as they arrived, the women starting to prepare its fur and skin for further use while the cooks picked up everything else they had managed to savage together.

They were the last to arrive back. The other hunting parties managed a little more than they. Fili felt no sense of shame in that. A huntress and her small band of younger dwarrowdame had managed a sizable buck. The venison was being prepared in a boiling stew with seasoned herbs bartered off the villagers. It smelled of lemongrass and sage.

Still, Fili imagined it would be tasteless. Salt was harder to get a hold of this time of year. The palace in Erebor had it supplied, but Fili doubted the men of this town were willing to share the luxury of it.

Shrugging off his pack, Fili placed it with one of the wagons and other hunting supplies, pushing his hair to the side. He touched the marks idly, knowing how visible they were. In such passion, there would be virtually no way the prince's neck would have remained clean.

No one said a word to him. If they stared, they looked away quickly, or strangely upon the human that followed in his shadow.

Thorin was no less pleased at the sight of them. His looks of disapproval burned into Fili, but the prince only met him with a neutral expression.

Kili wanted to sink through the ground.

He sighed quietly, sitting down on the ground against the tree and let his gaze sweep over the fields. Despite everything that had happened, he could still see most of the dwarves find happiness in small things.

The laughter of the children, their love who had survived.

He ended up talking with some of the dwarflings, telling them stories that had them wide eyed and laughing in delight.

They were fascinated by him, the children, as few of them as there were. All young and wide eyed, sticky fingered and a little skittish at having to travel. But they warmed up to Kili, to his strange tales of things not of this world. Stories for children, or the books he had read that spoke of amazing things that had the dwarflings leaning close on their knees.

Fili was enchanted by it, how easily the man brought out the joy in the young, the laughter and the smiles with a few missing teeth and the giggles of the children. When supper finally arrived, the children were called by their elders, but they seemed hesitant to leave as Kili was likely in the middle of a very exciting tale.

But they scrambled upward for their mothers and fathers, not before one particularly small dwarfling kissed Kili on the cheek before running off, his pudgy face flushed from cold and what was likely growing adoration.

Fili followed the child with fond eyes, shaking his head.

Accepting the bowl from one of the dwarves with a soft thanks, Kili relaxed back and started to eat.

Sitting alone seemed to suit Kili just fine, still, the blond approached, pipe in hand.

“Might I join you?” Fili asked.

"As long as you keep the pipe away from me." Kili sounded amused, eyes twinkling.

The prince laughed, sitting at the base of the tree.

“Worry not,” Fili said. “I'm saving the last of that particular weed.”

There was nowhere else in the world it grew. Fili was certain, after the dragon's desolation and the sickness of it's presence would drive the Rocs away, and the plant would whither into nothingness.

It was a memory of home and its comforts. The things they had left of it would run thin.

“Tobacco,” Fili said as he lit the pipe. “Does nothing. Smells sweet when it's fresh, a bit rancid when it isn't.”

Kili nodded in understanding, spooning the stew in his mouth with a quiet hum. He stared at the company, releasing a soft sigh.

"It won't be long until we reach the town. Couple of days, I heard some of the dwarves speak. Do you truly think the Wizard is going to be there?"

Fili slowly blew smoke through his nose, looking thoughtful. “He very well could be. But he is a wandering Wizard. He goes west often. Sometimes north or south, but west, if I remember the stories, he says there's comforts there that aren't anywhere else in the world. Safer treads are through the pathways carved by men, and he takes roads through Rohan often.”

He paused, tapping ash from the pipe.

“I don't know how they'll feel about a troupe of homeless dwarves. Uncle will likely not want to stay longer than we have to...” Fili bit on the end of the pipe thoughtfully. “Either way, if that is where you must part from me-- from us, I mean. I do wish you luck in returning home. Or at least, I hope the Grey Wanderer is able to give you answers.”

"I truly hope so too." Kili replied with a sigh, lowering the cup on the ground once he was done.

He wanted to get home.

He didn't belong here, and he felt responsible of what had happened.

But at the same time...

He didn't have much time to think about it before the all too familiar ringing started in his ear, his face draining of all color.

It hit him before he could react, drowning him in agonizing pain, his hands slamming down over his ears as a scream was torn from his lips.

Fili dropped his pipe at the sound, immediately moving to Kili's side. The man was lost in another painful vision, clutching at his head as the ache overpowered him. The prince grasped Kili's shoulders, not able to do much else than to hold him in his fit and call his name.

Tears slid down Kili's cheeks, trembles wrecking his body with each sharp gasp of pain he released. God, there was blood, there was blood on the ground. A sharp growl reached his ears and he jerked as something pierced through his shoulder, and someone was screaming behind his feet, something small, something--

His head flung back with a gasp, eyes wide and empty as he stared at the sky before dissolving into tears, covering his face.

“Kili,” Fili repeated his name. He kept repeating his name, hands firm and grounding on the brunet's shoulders. He stroked his arms and his hair.

“Kurdu,” Fili murmured, placing a hand over Kili's wrist. He whispered close to his ear as the man sobbed helplessly, sagging against his chest in grief and despair. So Fili continued to whisper, quiet comforts in the ancient language of his people.

It took him quite a while before he calmed down, before his heart rate had slowed back to normal and he wasn't close to hyperventilating.

He hiccuped, wiping his eyes on the back of his hand before looking around with a glassed over gaze.

"Something's... something's going to happen soon. I saw the company preparing to leave and I heard something growling, something... god.. there was so much blood..."

“Wolves?” Fili asked, swallowing thickly. “Did you see what it was?”

Kili shook his head. "Bigger. They were like wolves, but--" He cut himself off, turning a wide-eyed look at the blond. "Wargs."

Wargs meant orcs.

Fili heard little of their activity, but their stories were enough to frighten grown men. Like dragons, they hadn't quite been seen in quite a long time. Twisted creatures with rows of teeth, the product of torture and corruption of the elven race.

Kili hadn't been wrong about any of his terrifying visions as of yet.

“Kili,” Fili placed a hand on the man's cheek, gently stroking a fresh tear as it escaped him. “You're frightened, I understand. But we know now. We will prepare.”

"We don't have much time." Kili whispered horrified, staring at Fili. He had only read about orcs, only read how vicious and cruel they could be. How they tortured and killed their victims.

And now he would have to face them himself.

The thought left him trembling, burying his face against his knees.

Kili was in a state, shivering beyond cold. He was clearly shaken, struck with fear.

“Listen to me,” Fili said, gently touching Kili's hair. He drew his face up, looking into his eyes. “I will speak to my uncle. I will tell Thorin of what you saw. We will prepare, we will be ready. I won't let them hurt you.”

Or anyone else, if Fili could help it.

The blond leaned forward, and pressed a light kiss on Kili's lips, tasting the salt of his tears. He lingered there a moment, and pulled away slowly.

Kili blinked slowly, staring at Fili surprised. He hadn't thought the prince would openly show or prove what had happened between them, and the kiss had caught him by surprise.

Still weirdly, he trusted Fili's words, giving a small nod of understanding. 

"Talk to him. We have to hurry." He whispered hugging his arms around his knees, burying his face back down to calm himself down.

Nodding, Fili stood from his place on the ground and hurriedly moved to the barn. He paused on his way, glancing back at the human who still huddled in on himself in his distress. Still, there was nothing the blond could do but warn Thorin of the oncoming danger.

Thorin listened as his heir spoke, face unreadable in the haste of his nephew's concerned words as they fell from his lips. They sat about the fire, with a few of Thorin's closest advisers, warriors and friends.

“Are you certain?” He asked.

“Yes,” Fili said. “I cannot doubt him. Not after the dragon, or the river. His visions give him great pain, and he suffers both the prediction and the reality of it.”

“It is as I suspected,” Oin said, scratching his beard with his ear horn. “That man is a seer. An unfortunate one. Poor luck will follow his every step.”

“Then why do we keep him?” Asked another dwarf. Gloin, a man with a great flaming beard and thick brows. “Our luck's been shite as it is with the coming of that beast. Why not throw him to his dangers and we leave?”

“It isn't like the man summoned the monster,” Balin took his turn to speak. “It would have come regardless, I feel. How can the arrival of one man tip the scale of fate in another direction? Our woes would come, predicted or not.”

Fili bit his tongue at that. He said nothing that would possibly bring blame to Kili as his elders continued to argue.

How little they truly knew.

“I still say we leave him,” Gloin said with a scowl. “We canno' go on with poor fortune. We've lost too many on the road, and more before. Our numbers will dwindle yet.”

“We don't know that,” Fili frowned. “His predictions could save our people. We can prepare for the dangers ahead because he can see them.”

“Oh, is it because you find his 'gifts' useful that you want to put us all in danger?” Gloin glowered. “Or is it because you're thinking with the other head instead of the one on your shoulders?”

The prince's marks felt particularly exposed then.

Fili flushed dark, anger bubbling in his chest. He opened his mouth to say something foul, but Thorin hushed them with a wave of his hand.

“Enough,” The king scowled at all of them. “I understand your concerns, Gloin, but Fili is your prince still yet.”

“... apologies.” Gloin mumbled, but he still seemed quite unhappy. His sentiments were shared, if the expression on everyone else's faces were any indication.

“We will be ready,” Thorin said as he stood. “We will have double watches. Women and children will stay close. Anyone who can hold a weapon will be given one. We protect our own, whether or not this prophecy comes true.”

Kili glanced at the others anxiously now and then, not sure if he liked the grim looks on their faces. He was nothing but trouble, he knew that.

But if his fears were right, if Fili's thoughts were right, the darker side could know about him. Could know about what he could do, as unintentional as it was.

He wouldn't be safe with the dwarves, bu he wouldn't be safe out there either.

Wiping the tears from his eyes, he grabbed the bow, slinging the quiver on his back before turning to look towards the forest, eyes scanning the area.


	10. Chapter 10

The dwarves set themselves in motion as Thorin dismissed them to gather weapons. Women and children were gathered into the barn, the youngest protected by the warm bodies of their mothers and car takers at the inner most center of it. It was an odd set up, one not leaving the people unsettled. But orders were orders from the king, and they understood he only looked out for their safety.

Former guardsmen and others took up what they had to fight with. Swords, bows, axes, forging hammers. There was not much that could be done about armor. Many of the dwarves that were with them had been at the wedding ceremony. What remained in the wagons was finery, flimsy silk and useless material. It would do nothing against the cold or the things that lurked in the dark.

The night was quiet, save for the sound of Fili's own even breathing as he stood outside. At least the evening was clear, and the stars were bright in the sky. The moon was full, and large overhead, illuminating the small village below.

The prince stood at Kili's side, his twin blades in hand.

“Anything?” Fili asked quietly. The man did have excellent eye sight. If there was anything, he would surely see them first.

Kili shook his head, grip tight around the bow. So far there had been nothing, and he tried to count just how long they would have before the attack. In his vision, it had been dark and they had been prepared to move out.

It couldn't be long anymore.

"Listen." 

He closed his eyes for a moment, and the silence landed heavily upon their shoulders.

"Isn't it weird? We're on the border of the forest, but... there's no sounds of life anywhere. No birds, no crickets, no animals running around."

It was eerie. Even the village at the foot of the hill seemed stuck at a standstill. There was no chimney smoke, or the light of burning fire. Windows were shut tight, the men were not about. The air itself was still. 

Fili felt himself shiver despite the cold. He shifted on his feet, rolling his shoulders to shake off the sudden dread.

Something wasn't right.

It happened so quickly Kili barely had time to realize the battle had started.

A shout pierced the air, one followed by a loud crunching noise and metal clashing together and suddenly there were orcs and wargs upon them.

Fili had only heard stories of wargs and their bearers. As a prince, he was far from a warrior, farther from a veteran. He hadn't met true battle. Sword instructors, sparring partners, but all his training couldn't prepare him for the brutality of the creatures that swarmed them now.

It was fear that drove his arm. It was the instinct to survive, utilizing a set of skills ingrained into his bones.

But the screams chilled him to the core, and shook him to his very foundation. How Fili found the will to move must have been the will of someone higher.

The prince struck at a snarling snout of a snapping beast whose eyes seemed to glow an eerie white, pushing his second blade through the throat of the monster. The warg choked and fell heavy at Fili's booted feet, dark blood staining the once pure white snow.

Kili nearly lost his balance as he ducked out of the way of the charging animal, heart hammering in his chest as he looked around. The orcs were... they were much more dangerous, more _real_ here than when he had read about them.

Much more deadly.

He was frozen.

His feet refused to move, his arm to raise up to defend himself. Everywhere his gaze landed there was nothing but pain and death, the shouts and screams filling his ear.

And that's when he saw him.

One of the children, a boy, trying to stand up against a warg and its rider. Trying to be like one of the soldiers.

Only then did Kili find the strength to act, his body moving on instinct as he ran and dodged his way past the falling wargs and orcs.

He pushed himself forward, knocking the boy out of the way and took the bite of the warg himself. The same pain he had felt in his vision shot through him and he grit his teeth against it, knees buckling.

Fili shouted his name in vain, the world seeming to slow down at the sight of the creature's maw clamped tight over Kili's shoulder.

For a moment the prince froze, the helplessness he felt all those years ago washing up from below deeply buried memory. Fili broke into a run then, lifting his swords with a cry and struck the creature's side.

It released Kili with a strangled yowl, unable to twist to bite at the dwarf as he struggled to pin it down with his swords. Fili struck it again through the skull, and the warg fell to the ground with a choked yelp.

The smell of blood was sharp, like raw iron. It stung Fili's nose, and still he held onto the hilt of his swords, breathing heavily as he slid off the side of the fallen beast's neck.

Kili fell down on his knees, clutching the bleeding shoulder with sharp gasps. The pain blinded him, left him trembling and whining quietly but his lips still quirked up in a weak smile when the boy he had saved rushed close to him. 

He touched his arm gently, wiping the tears from the child's face. "Let's... let's get you to safety, alright?" he mumbled struggling to stand up, looking at Fili. "Will... are you alright?"

The tiny dwarfling nodded, sniffling and mouth trembling as he fought off tears. He clung to Kili's knees, shaking.

Fili had pulled the weapons from the carcass, dark blood staining the metal, his clothes. He breathed out heavy puffs of hair, breath misting in the cold. He glanced at the carnage of beast and orc, shoulders tensing at the sound of more fighting lower in the hill. He dropped the blades, moving to Kili's side.

“Come on,” he said, expression probably as strange as he felt. Fili held onto Kili's side, helping him stay steady. 

Kili leaned against Fili, thankful for the support as his other hand curled around the small dwarfling, holding him close and safe. "It'll be alright, just keep your eyes on the ground." Kili murmured soothing the child the best he could, swaying a bit as they slowly made their way back over to the barn where the women and children resided in safety.

A young mother wept openly at the return of her youngest son. She pulled him close and kissed his hair, the small boy clinging to her bosom. She thanked Kili and the prince profusely through her tears, and took to tending to Kili's wounds along with the healers who had stayed behind.

Fili let them take Kili, not allowing relief to overtake him yet. He shrugged off the hands of Oin and another dwarrowdame as they tried to get him to remove his clothes to check if any of the blood on him was his own. The prince shook his head.

“I'm not injured,” he said. “Tend to him. I must... I must go back outside.”

Kili turned his head at the words, struggling to pull his shirt back on after the wound had been patched up with how they could. "Then I'm going with you." He replied standing up, ignoring the blood on his shirt.

"You taught me to use a weapon for a reason, and I'm not taking no for an answer."

“You can't,” Fili said immediately, giving Kili a hard stare that he hoped would have masked the panic. Still, the man glared back at him, determined to follow. Determined to help. The blond shook his head.

“You have to stay here. Be seen to. How can you expect to hold a bow like that?” He motioned to Kili's torn shoulder. An injury that likely pained him greatly, despite the medicine.

“That bite is deep, lad.” Oin said, holding onto the human's arm, stilling his movements momentarily. “Warg teeth are not clean. You'll risk infection. Or worse, if you go back out there.”

"It only hurts in certain position. I can still use a bow." Kili replied with a shake of his head, pulling his arm free from Oin's hand. He couldn't care less about possible infection, or the pain using a weapon could possible cause.

He wanted to help.

He wanted to be useful for the others, wanted to prove himself.

"Either you take me with you, or I will sneak out by myself. You know I will do it."

Something in his heart confirmed that, and that knowledge only served to pain Fili more. He swallowed visibly.

But there was no convincing him. And he doubted a pile of dwarven women would likely keep him down, either.

Shaking his head again, Fili still seemed conflicted.

“You will stay close to me,” Fili said, trying to keep his voice from becoming unsteady. “You won't be reckless.” He placed a hand over Kili's wrist. “If it concerns my life or yours, you will keep yours. Promise me this.”

Fili was insane if he thought he would let the prince sacrifice himself for him. There was no way he would let such a thing happen. These people knew Fili, and needed him. They didn't need some... see'er like he was.

"Whatever makes you feel at ease." He finally replied, taking the bow and quiver one of the females handed over to him.

"Come on, they need help out there."

“Kili,” Fili's brows furrowed. But he was right, there was no time. He would trust the man to keep his promise. The prince fought to keep Kili from the hands of death. He wouldn't lose him now.

He couldn't.

Rolling his shoulders, he moved ahead of the brunet back out into the night, grabbing a hold of his swords as they descended the hillside.

Kili offered him a careful smile in return, following the prince back in the night. He was afraid, he was so afraid he feared he would not survive this.

But he did his best to mask it, notching an arrow on the bow and shooting it through the warg approaching on their left. It didn't kill it but it did knock it enough for another dwarf to finish the job.

And christ did it hurt.

Each arrow shot felt like it tore his shoulder open, sending burning pain through his whole body.

Coupled with the bite of the bitter cold, Kili's injury might have only felt worse.

But at least he did what he promised. He was close to Fili's side, and the prince made sure he felt his presence or could see him. He helped the other dwarves as they fought, the orcs and wargs flanked by Kili's arrows, followed by Fili's blades or the swing of another dwarf's hammer.

But the one person the prince sought was nowhere in sight.

“Where is the king?!” Fili called out as he helped slay a twisted orc. He left it twitching beneath his boot, ripping free his blade from the creature's chest.

“Further down the way, with the Fundinsons.” Gloin said lifting his axe. He was injured across the face, frowning heavily at the sight of the prince and the man that stood by his side. “We will keep to the base of the hill.”

Fili clasped the older dwarf's shoulder in thanks, and motioned for Kili to follow him quickly.

Kili clutched his shoulder, the fabric sticky and warm with blood that kept seeping through. But he was still following Fili, keeping up with the dwarf until he could spot Thorin and Dwalin fight with couple of wargs down the hill.

Not even hesitating, he let the arrows fly at the creatures, hoping to drive their attention away from the dwarves.

Thorin's face matted with sweat and the dark blood the creatures that continued to assault him. Dwalin was a constant shadow by the king's side, blocking and giving blows as they could, almost tirelessly. But the grace Thorin had was wavering as exhaustion began to overtake the adrenaline.

Both Fili and Kili took to lighten the load, Kili picking off the straggling or the dying. Distracting the stronger to make way for Dwalin's double axes, Fili's blades or Thorin's long sword.

When there was nothing left but blood and bodies, Fili turned his attention to his uncle, the proud dwarf battered, and leaning heavily on Dwalin's side.

A long cut lay jagged over his right eye, which the king squeezed tightly shut.

In his entire life, Fili had never seen Thorin make a single mistake. He assumed, as a child and now, that his uncle was invincible. Like a mountain, big and sturdy, someone to look up at in awe and know he would never falter.

The prince moved to his side, but Thorin held up his hand to keep his nephew at bay. He pushed himself off Dwalin, staggering, but allowed no one to touch him.

“Thorin,” the bigger dwarf made no effort to hide his concern. The king only shook his head, dark loosened braids falling over his shoulder.

“Gather our people,” Thorin said, voice rough. He moved passed them, towards the hill. “We must leave. Now.”

Something didn't sit right with Fili. Thorin seemed anxious, almost angry. He watched his uncle's back warily.

“Will we at least count our dead?” Dwalin frowned as he tailed Thorin's shadow to the barn. The other dwarves seemed frightened at the sight of them, covered in blood and bruises and cuts.

Inside the barn, the injured were being tended to, questions were being asked of the men and women who had returned regarding loved ones who fought. Grim news followed more grim news, and the mourning was beginning to settle in.

“We cannot.” Thorin said, depositing his shield and sword upon the ground near their wagons. “There is not much time. More will come. See to your injuries, then gather everyone. Everything. Fili.”

The blond's head snapped up at the call of his name. “Yes, uncle?”

“Gather a party of able hands. Take the horses from the village. Food, water.”

“Just.. just take them?” Dwalin's brows shot up. “What of the men?”

“They are likely dead,” Thorin frowned. “Killed silently as we were stalked.” He lowered his voice. “I feel... I am certain we are being hunted.”


	11. Chapter 11

The reality of Thorin's words were harder to look upon than to hear. Fili brought able dwarves to the village, and through open doors they searched homes for essentials.

The prince, through little hope, looked for survivors. All he found were bloodied bodies in the beds, others upon their floors. Slit throats, broken necks. He murmured prayers from the stone for them, covering them as he could with sheets or blankets. He closed the eyes of children. Fili knew not where humans went when they died, still, he hoped for Mahal's watchful gaze as their spirits passed, to walk sturdy and safe paths to the world beyond.

In a nursery Fili found a crib gently rocking against the wind of an open window, curtains billowing. He remembered his mother telling him to never leave a window open in his little brother's nursery, for fear of illness upon the baby. Out of habit, he closed it, and pulled the curtains closed to keep the light dim.

Heart heavy, Fili lingered by the bars of the crib, staring at the small lump that was hidden beneath the sheets. He reached through, gently touching the visible fingers of the infant that lay there.

The touch drew a wail from the child's lips, one that spoke of hunger or perhaps fear. It drew the attention of the dwarves in the house, and one of them picked up the child carefully.

Fili's mouth fell open at the sound. He hadn't expected the child to be alive.

Baby still, and very young in dwarven standards. "We cant leave him to starve." The dwarf murmured tucking it against his chest.

“Blessed Mahal,” Fili murmured. The sound of the baby's cries was like music to him. Hungry, frightened, tired, the sound of life. A light in this dark moment.

Nodding, the prince allowed him to carry the tiny human, the little bundle tucked into the fur-lined coat of the dwarf that held him.

As ordered, food, water and the horses were taken back to the barn, which had become busy with packing and moving. Fili's party returned with large clydesdales, meant for farming and pulling wagons. They were docile towards their small handlers, but were certainly too big for any dwarf to ride properly. But they would have to make due.

The commotion at the arrival of the baby had given pause to the dwarrowdame and the children who gathered to see him. How small he was, fragile and certainly loud in his demands for care, which the women readily gave.

Fili joined Kili where the injured were being patched, his burdens feeling strangely lighter.

"You found a survivor." Kili said quietly, a small smile playing on his lips as he watched the child being taken care of by the dwarrowdame. The sight of the small child eased a bit the situation, some of the tension leaving their shoulders.

"We're leaving within the next hour from what I've heard. Thorin wants to get us out of here and somewhere more sheltered."

“Aye,” Fili nodded, but he took a moment to sit with Kili nonetheless. He watched with fond eyes as the child was fussed over by the mothers who had lost their own. Light returned to their mournful gazes, tender smiles playing their lips.

It made everything seem less grim.

“Are you all right, though?” Fili asked, turning his eyes to Kili. The bandages around his shoulders were visible through his shirt.

"I'll survive. It's... a lot different to read about such creatures than actually fighting them." Kili replied with a wry smile, shaking his head after a small moment. "It's something I don't wish to get used to." 

He wasn't sure how long he would survive through such battles. Alone, probably not for long.

"What about you? Are you alright?"

“Bruised, likely.” Fili said, returning Kili's smile with a small, forced grin. “But fine.”

As fine as he could be. But he felt the sight of those teeth, the twisted faces of the orcs would never leave his nightmares.

He did not wish to encounter them again, but knew if his uncle's words were true, they would come. And they would keep coming. For what, Fili had his suspicions, but said nothing for now. Instead he reached for Kili's hand, and squeezed it for comfort, to keep the ill thoughts at bay.

"...Do they know about me?" Kili asked carefully, fingers sliding between Fili's own. It was a question that bothered him probably the most, yet a part of him didn't want to know the answer.

“It's... possible,” Fili said gently. “I won't lie, it's not as if that hasn't crossed my mind.” He idly stroked the back of Kili's knuckles. “But I don't know for certain.”

"I mean, this whole-- none of this was meant to happen. And now an ambush? And let's face it, the warg could have torn me apart easily if it wanted to." Kili said quietly. "Yet it held back." And as long as he was with the company, they would suffer because of him.

“Kili,” Fili held his hand tighter. It would make sense, it was highly possible.

But there was no solid proof of that. Perhaps that is where Fili took comfort in. The unknown, the uncertainty of it all. Although, it would be difficult to say it was all a huge coincidence.

Fili worried his bottom lip, thoughtful.

“We don't know anything yet.” He said finally. “We can't linger on those thoughts, especially if they are uncertain.” The blond reached up, gently touching the human's face, drawing up his gaze. 

He couldn't stay either.

Not when his presence would cause grief and death to a race that didn't deserve it.

His gaze was conflicted as he met Fili's eyes, tiny smile flickering on his lips. He liked the prince, he really did. That's why he didn't want him hurt.

"I need to speak with Thorin." He murmured, brushing his fingers against Fili's chin lightly before rising up. "I'll be back soon."

He left the blond with a last smile, taking nearly hesitant steps towards the king where he barely seemed to allow himself being patched up.

"Uhm...Thorin, a word if you may?"

Thorin, in his pride, was determined to bandage himself. But the healers with him merely tutted, and made disapproving sounds at his attempts. He gave up halfway through, allowing the dwarrowdame and Oin to finish tending to his wounds.

His right eye was covered entirely, and a vague scent of pulverized herbs lingered as Oin finished rubbing a salve over sore bruises and open cuts.

The king acknowledged the man as he approached, and dismissed Oin and his helper. They left him be, though hesitantly.

“Speak, seer.” Thorin said, his voice gruff. But he seemed more annoyed at his dressings than Kili himself.

"You know these creatures are after me, right?" Kili asked leaning against the wall, touching his shoulder gingerly, gaze flicking around the room of dwarves. "And... as long as I'm with you, you're on the line of fire. More death, more pain and grief. I can't handle it anymore." 

He smiled sadly, lowering his gaze on the floor. "They're after me, even if they cannot do anything with my abilities. All I'd see is death and catastrophes. My only chance is to find my way to Rohan, and hope the Wizard would help me. There's just... one thing I need your assistance with."

The king listened silently as Kili spoke, leaning heavily over his knees. He might have known what the creatures wanted, who they were after, or why. 

But Thorin said nothing to Kili's suspicions. Which might have convinced the man that his assumptions were true.

“There is nothing that ties you here,” Thorin replied. “You are free to leave when you wish to. I only humor my nephew, as he seemed to desire your presence greatly. I hadn't known why then. It might have been your name, as I assume you know of what happened to our youngest Durinson.”

The king paused a moment, sizing Kili with his visible eye. “However, it wasn't until after you had returned from hunting that I saw that there was much more than just a fond memory of his brother. Despite that, you have been helpful in your endeavors in repair, care, and even fighting. What is your request, seer?”

"What you just spoke, is what I fear the most." Kili replied, smiling a bit. "He, Fili.... he would not let me go. He would demand to follow me, to make sure I reach my destination safely. And he's needed here. Your people need him."

He straightened a bit. "I won't let him do that. I'm not going to take him with me. I can't let him know I'm leaving. And by the time he realizes I'm gone, it's too late." 

He turned to face the king with another smile. "Can you pretend to send me to get more water from the pond? I'll be on my way by then."

Thorin considered him for a moment, a frown on his lips.

It was likely for the best. Heartbreak could be mended over time, loss and further death could not be undone. The safety and care of their people came first. 

“Take a few cantines and have one of the wagon handlers saddle you a horse.” Thorin said, standing slowly. “Take the supplies you need. I will give Fili another task to keep him busy.”

Kili's shoulders relaxed, and he winced quietly as it tore on the wounds. "Thank you." 

“Fili,” Thorin approached his nephew where he sat, and the blond stood up.

“Uncle,” Fili responded, before taking a moment to look around for Kili. “... is something the matter? Where is--?”

“He came to me asking if there were tasks he could do to help us move on quicker,” Thorin said immediately, cutting off the prince. “I sent him for more water. I would have you help the wounded into the wagons. This camp moves once they are.”

“Yes, your reverence.” Fili said, swallowing visibly, and moved from his spot by the fire to do as he was told. He worked with Oin and his volunteers, unaware of the dwarf that had saddled one of the clydesdales leading the beast through the back of the barn, where Kili stood in waiting.

"Tell the king my thanks. I hope you find a place you can call home." Kili said pushing himself on the horse a tad clumsily, his shoulder restricting his movements.

"And if the prince asks... tell him I'm sorry." He glanced over his shoulder, thoughts drifting to the blond and he swallowed visibly. Fighting back the tears he smacked his lips, encouraging the horse in a run and the pair disappeared in the darkness.

*

Helping the wounded was tougher work than Fili had anticipated, but was happy once the job had finished. The wagons were loaded, the ponies replaced by the village horses for longer strides. The ponies were saddled for those that could ride, or loaded with other supplies that would not fit.

The night outside was still clear, the moon having not quite vanished as it grew later and dawn would soon arrive, obscuring the sky in blue and purple gradients as the stars slowly started to disappear.

The dwarves were gathered, Thorin at the forefront on a shaggy pony, and he spoke loud. “Our original intention was to take the paths of men. But it seems that is a dangerous endeavor. I will not hide that we might be stalked by the minions of Mordor.”

The people began to murmur uncomfortably, mothers suddenly holding their children tight at the news.

“We will take to more unknown roads, hidden pathways through deep woods.” Thorin said. “Forests, and mountains. Our journey will be long, it will be treacherous, but I would see you all to the safety of the Blue Mountains far to the west, to our brothers and sisters of Ered Luin, away from the claws of the dark things that hunt us. Stay close, keep your children beside you. We march.”

At the end of Thorin's speech, the people began to move, with fright on their minds and a suspicion of every single shadow.

But away from the roads of men...?

Fili's eyes narrowed, and he moved the pony he was given to walk by Thorin's side.

“What of Rohan?” he asked. “The roads are safer. We are more likely to die falling from cliffs!”

“The roads grow dangerous, nephew.” Thorin said. “A more merciful death to the unfortunate. I will see no one claimed by orc blade or warg teeth. No, I would rather risk those pathways.”

“What of Kili?” Fili asked. “What of the Wizard?” He marched his pony ahead of Thorin, stopping before him to halt his own mount. “Our answers lay in Rohan. The attacks, the dragon, Kili's arrival... what this all means. We can't--”

“His answers, Fili.” Thorin said coolly. “That is the seer's quest, not ours. Our hearts lie with our people. I will not risk more lives for a human who I owe nothing. Let him take his journwy. We will take ours.”

“He's helped us. His visions have saved us more grief,” Fili protested, “He's...”

The realization hit him like a blow to the head. He looked to Thorin with slightly widened eyes. “... he is... he is gone.”

The king regarded him, face expressionless. Fili made a motion to turn his pony, but Thorin blocked him off, scowling.

“Don't be a fool,” Thorin said. “You are my heir, a prince to Erebor's throne. You belong here with your people. You are needed here.”

“I...” Fili began. Thorin was right. He was right, he was needed here. But his heart tugged painfully knowing Kili had gone off on his own. After everything they had gone through. The blond found himself staring at the back of his pony's neck.

“It wasn't to be, nephew.” Thorin said then, face softening. He sighed heavily, moving his pony forward. “And it cannot, even if he did decide to stay. You know this.”

That knowledge dug at the wound harder. It was something Fili knew all too well. The prince clutched at the reins, glancing to the front of the line where Thorin had taken his place, and the marching dwarves that followed him. Fili looked over the young, the old. Parents, and the adoptive mothers of the small human child they carried close, and for a moment the prince felt utterly selfish.

His heart pulled him back, and his mind told him to follow the booted feet of his people.

“Rasup gamut ,” he murmured and smiled sadly. Fili pulled on the reins of his pony and broke her into a gallop, startling a few of the marchers as he rushed back.

He ignored the call of his name.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> rasup gamut = farewell


	12. Chapter 12

Admittedly, Fili was not the best tracker when it came to hunting someone rather than something. But the horse left a trail in the snow for the first few days, and Kili's campsites had been obvious with the stone circles and the remnants of burnt embers put out by the frozen flakes.

Fili continued to follow the signs, determined to find him.

Still, the blizzard was an unexpected and unfortunate turn of events.

It was becoming harder and harder to push through the wind and the heavy flurry. Fili trembled even through his cloak, hood drawn as he tried to lead his pony through the bank. Her head ducked as his did, shaggy main caking with the constant snow fall.

It was a miracle they were able to find the base of a jutting cliff, temporarily blocking away the wind. Fili pulled the reins along side it, his pony making a noise of protest. He paused to stroke her muzzle.

“You're all right, girl.” He said to her, and the pony huffed hot breath against his gloved hands. “Just a little farther. There's shelter somewhere...”

Fili clicked coaxingly at her, the pony following his commands hesitantly. He lead her further along the cliff face, finding the mouth of a cave.

"Uhm..."

Fili's head snapped up at the sound, drawing a hunting knife he kept at his side, startling his pony a little.

He looked towards the dark of the cave, eyes having not quite adjusted. But he could make out the shape of someone, and a much larger beast against the light of a very dim flame.

“... Kili?” Fili murmured.

"What the hell are you doing here?!" Kili hissed lowering his own blade, relaxing slowly now that he knew the dwarf was no trouble.

Fili sheathed his own weapon and gently tugged the reins of his pony. The shaggy creature shook out her flank as she entered, almost immediately recognizing the larger beast as docile and moved to settle close to Kili's horse for warmth.

“Looking for you,” Fili answered, turning his eyes to the human.

"No, definitely not." Kili shook his head, sitting back before the tiny flame. "You're going straight back to your people once the storm is over."

Fucking Thorin, could he do anything right?

“I can't.” Fili shook his head. He smiled at Kili's back, although the human couldn't see it. He moved to the other side of Kili's rather pathetic attempt at a fire, and sat with his legs crossed.

“I'm going with you.” He said.

"You're not. I'm not taking you with me, the fact I left alone should tell you as much." Kili replied with a small frown, poking the fire with a stick in a desperate attempt to make it larger.

“I am going with you,” Fili said. He reached into a pouch at his side, taking a pinch of dried plant fiber and dusted it over the small flame. It flared a little, and began to burn as Kili stoked at it. Taking a flint from his pouch next, Fili snapped a spark over the twigs.

Light filled their small space, illuminating tired faces and the grim line of Kili's lips.

“Even if you refuse my company, I will follow you.” Fili said, closing the pouch. “From one end of Arda to the next.”

"I swear to god I will tie you up on your pony and send it back to the others." Kili muttered frowning towards the fire.

It was a relief when the fire grew a bit, warming him a bit more before he tugged the cloak tighter around himself.

Fili chuckled. “You're welcome to try that.”

He watched Kili's face, the man seeming unhappy at his appearance.

The prince's heart sank a little, but he said nothing of it.

“Why did you leave?” He asked instead. “And not with a single word to me?”

"Because it's not safe for you to be with me!" Kili snapped like it was obvious and honestly-- it should have been.

"Because I bring nothing but death and grief to everyone around me! It's easier for me to go alone, and figure out a way back home, than let something else happen to you or your people."

“Do you honestly believe that would change their fate?” Fili frowned deeply. “Your visions had saved lives we could have lost if we stayed ignorant at the village. You didn't command those orcs to attack us. With or without you they march on the tip of a needle held by death, but that is no fault of yours. I did not warn my people of the dragon, because I did not believe you. And now look where we are.”

The prince heaved in a breath. “In the beginning I blamed you for the dragon's descent. I was convinced for some time that perhaps your arrival had something to do with it. But I thought on the things you've said, and you are not evil. You see, but you can't control what happens. Our fates were sealed even before you arrived.”

"No, it was not sealed!" Kili stood up, pacing around the cave frustrated. "I know, I've read it thousands of times! Everything started going south the moment I arrived! The only reason I had visions about you and your people, the orcs, is because they were after me, and I was with you! You're safe without me!"

“I am no less safe on the roads my king takes than I am with you,” Fili stood as well. “They take to passes long since gone and to bridges my uncle only hopes still stand. Dark things will hunt them, dark things will hunt you. No matter where I am, death looms. And it is not because of you.”

He moved towards Kili, taking him by the hand, stopping him in his pacing. “I am here because I chose to die with you. My heart tells me I belong here.”

"I'm not your brother, alright?! I don't need you to protect me!"

Fili felt as if his breath had been pulled from his lungs, and his heart stilled. Words were lost, as a feeling akin to shame washed over him. Kili didn't look at him, presence cold. And for that, Fili was thankful. At least he didn't see the pain on his face, the words cutting a deep wound over long healed scars.

It was silent, save for the blow of the blizzard at the mouth of the cave, the crackle of the fire and shift of the horses as they sought warmth.

“... No.” Fili said quietly after a long while, finally looking away from Kili's form. “No, you aren't.”

Kili felt his own heart shatter at the empty tone of Fili's voice, and he had to fight himself from reaching out to pull Fili back close and comfort him. He had to stay though.

"No." He murmured, shaking his head a bit before laying down on the thin blanket, hoping to gather more warmth that way. "The storm should be done by the morning."

There wasn't much left to say after that. The prince's words were lost, the things he wanted to tell Kili gone, or somehow without meaning or impact. Thoughts of his little brother lingered with each, the protective feelings Fili felt for someone who was no longer there.

At first, Fili could look at Kili as he did that tiny dwarfling who hung onto him so many years ago.

And now...

They had kissed. They touched, tasted and found comfort in each other. Was it the pleasure of the smoke that induced it, or deep desire, a want Fili pretended to see in Kili's eyes, felt on his lips through desperate kisses? Perhaps it was just a plea of the body to feel anything else other than despair. Temporary joy.

Despite the fire, Fili felt cold as he rested against the belly of his pony. He fiddled with the pipe in his hands, tracing the markings carved into maple wood, unable to sleep.

The younger man kept tossing and turning, not finding peace from his mind nor the cold that seeped into his bones. He was damp and really uncomfortable, and the heavy silence made his heart feel thrice as heavy as it had been before.

But he had to do it.

It was for Fili's own good.

It was a mantra he kept repeating in his head.

Fili could hear Kili shifting, the chatter of his teeth from the cold. Swallowing, the blond stood up carefully, unraveling the fur blanket he always carried. He walked over silently, and draped it over the brunet without a word.

He moved back to his pony, petting her muzzle and her ears, before settling at her side again. Taking out another pouch, Fili took a pinch or two of what was left of the Roc, and lit it.

Kili squeezed his eyes shut, fingers tracing the furs on the blanket slowly. It was warmer, helped his body to settle in some kind of peace.

It was not right.

He had said such a horrible thing, and still Fili looked after him. It was not fair how a dwarf as trusting and loving as the prince ended up with someone like him.

He parted his lips, licked them before clearing his throat and spoke up quietly.

"....I saw my parents die before it even happened."

Fili took in a deep breath, the fibers dry and a little stale on his tongue from poor storage. Still, the taste was slightly sweet, and the smoke just as fragrant. He exhaled slowly through his nose.

He shifted a little as Kili spoke.

“... that must have been terrible for you.” He said quietly.

"I walked to school that day knowing I would come back to an empty house. I kissed my mother goodbye, and told my father that I loved him. I still remember them teasing me for going soft." Kili said quietly, curling in a smaller ball under the blanket.

"I can't.... Fili, I _can't_ handle seeing another person I care for _die_."

Fili watched the burning embers inside the bowl of the pipe, and lightly nipped the mouth piece thoughtfully.

He listened to the sound of the fire, and the waver in Kili's voice as he spoke his deepest fear. He looked over the curled form of the human, who seemed even smaller beneath the blanket. He knew Kili's concerns were legitimate, his worries not to be ignored.

Still, Fili found he couldn't just leave him.

“Have you seen it then?” the prince asked. “Have you seen my death?”

Kili's head jerked up in surprise and he shook it nearly violently fast. "No! No, I haven't." Fili wasn't supposed to die, not in this story. 

"But I'm afraid I will if you are with me. That's why you need to _go_ , Fili. I need you to join your people."

Kili feared for him greatly, so much he was willing to keep pushing him away.

Fili's lips curled a little, and he gave Kili a soft look. “It is a noble sentiment, to walk away with the curses you carry.”

The blond took another puff of the weed, before taking the pipe from his mouth. He tipped out the ash, and smothered the remains beneath his boot before slowly standing. He approached Kili, instead sitting near him, close enough to touch. He placed a hand on the brunet's shoulder, feeling him tense.

“But I've already made up my mind,” Fili gently moved the fur aside, running a hand over the curls he loved so. “I have looked at you as if you were the brother I've lost. I can't... I haven't tried to hide that. You share a name, and the same bright spirit. But perhaps it's wrong to do so now.”

"I would never forgive myself if something happened to you." Kili said quietly, trying to shrug Fili's hand away from his shoulder. He could never live past the guilt such incident would cause him.

"I _can't_ take you with me, please understand. I'll be fine on my own, knowing that you're safe where you belong."

“You aren't taking me anywhere,” Fili replied. “I go where I please. I choose my place, and it's by your side.”

“Amrâlimê...” The blond turned Kili then, looking at the fear evident in his eyes. The prince leaned closer, pressing his forehead to the brunet's gently. “I will not be content not knowing of your fate, even if you are so certain of mine.”

"I could always send a ranger to bring you a letter about my well-being." Kili whispered quietly, fingers curling in tight fists around the blanket to keep himself from reaching out.

“Perhaps you are dwarven,” Fili chuckled. “You are as stubborn as I.”

He gently brushed a curl behind Kili's ear, and nudged his nose against the other's, and brushed his lips to the human's lightly.

“A letter would not give me peace...”

"At least you'd know I'm still... you know, alive." Kili protested weakly, but each touch on his skin ate his resolve, made the walls he had built around himself break apart.

“I would know better by being here,” Fili murmured, touching Kili's neck with his fingertips. His skin was hot, flushed from touch. “I can feel your breath upon my lips, your pulse beneath my hands..”

The prince searched Kili's face. “I can see it for myself, and not miss a single moment.”

"There's not much to see." Kili murmured quietly, his head dropping back a bit as the prince traced his skin with his fingers. "Not much to feel. I'm broken, Fili. You deserve someone better than me."

“Don't,” Fili gently touched Kili's chin, tilting his head forward. “Look at me, please...” he held the brunet's face gently. “You are not broken. These visions do not define you, the things you see are no fault of your own.” He brushed the hair from Kili's eyes, and kissed his lips lightly. 

The prince shifted slightly, carefully moving over Kili's covered body. Fili kept himself close, pressing his lips to the corner of Kili's mouth.

“You cannot tell me what I deserve. What I deserve is my decision.” He murmured. “I chose you...”

"....your uncle is going to kill us both."

Chuckling quietly, Fili smiled lazily. “He would have to run me through first.”

Kili was Fili's choice in the end. From the start of his arrival to now. He would not regret it any longer. He would face his sins when the time came, when he passed, and Mahal would judge whether or not his statue belonged in his halls, or doomed to rubble.

For now, he would revel in Kili's presence. The warmth of Kili's skin, his mouth as the prince kissed him deeply, losing himself in the man he wanted to call his lover.

Kili's eyelids fluttered shut, the soft sigh escaping his lips swallowed by the pair on his own. His fingers tightened their hold of Fili's hair, urging him closer, to taste more.

Kili's mouth was as he remembered it to be. Soft and sweet and pliant beneath his own. Fili took his time in remapping the shape, the feel of the roof of Kili's mouth, his tongue as it slid against his. How quick they were to lose their breath, heated touches to the neck with sure hands, and fingers tangling in curling dark locks, or Fili's own thick hair.

The blond pulled away slowly, licking moist lips between soft pants. Fili smiled at Kili's slightly flushed face, his lips pink from kissing, and Fili couldn't help but place a few more on his parted mouth.

“I'm with you, to whatever end.” He promised quietly.

"What if the Wizard is able to help?" Kili asked trying to regain his breath, fingers drawing idle shapes on Fili's neck, tracing down the line to his collar bone. "What if... he sends me back. I'll be gone then, Fili." He pointed out quietly, flicking his gaze on the blond.

The thought hurt, but this wasn't his place, not his world. 

Sooner or later, he would have to leave.

The prince knew of this. That Kili would have to go back to the place he belonged, where he would be safe from the dark.

Fili felt he would never fall again. He knew in his heart this was it. His love would belong to Kili. He would not marry, although he would rule when the time came. Like in the original tale the brunet spoke of, he would take on his burdens alone.

“Then you would take my heart with you,” Fili said softly. He placed his hand over Kili's, squeezing his fingers lightly. “And I would part with it gladly, knowing you hold it.”

"There's no one else that could have mine." Kili murmured quietly, sliding their fingers together before placing a soft kiss on Fili's lips.

"It's bruised and scarred, but I know you'll take good care of it." 

It was nearly ironic, really, how his first love turned out to be that one person he had read of all his life. He knew he could love no one else the way he loved Fili, and he would cherish the last couple of days they'd have together.

“Scars and bruises do not take away from its worth,” Fili murmured. He settled close to Kili, resting his head on his shoulder, nuzzling his nose against his neck. “Nor yours. Amrâlimê, nulukh ra gimiluh. I will treasure you always.”

"That's... dwarven language, right?" Kili asked turning his head a bit, pressing his lips on Fili's forehead. "The book didn't speak much of it, only that it's a secret from other races."

Fili smiled a little at the feeling of Kili's lips, nodding. “Yes. Khuzdul. The traditional language of the dwarven kingdoms. Uncle would sheer my whiskers if he even caught an inkling of me whispering it to you.”

The prince pressed his lips briefly to the soft skin of Kili's neck, lingering for a moment. “It's hoarded away like many things we hold sacred. Children, treasure, knowledge. History. If it is dwarven, it is meant only for dwarves.”

Kili shuddered, enjoying the feel of Fili's lips on his neck. Fili was warm, he made the shivers of his body die away as he curled close to the prince.

"Don't worry, I won't tell him anything." He chuckled sliding his fingers through the blond hair.

Fili hummed in contentment at the feeling of Kili's fingers gently combing through his hair, pushing messy braids aside.

“I will trust you to keep your word,” Fili smiled in turn. He lifted his head, and pressed another kiss to the brunet's mouth. “Rest, nulukhithuh.”

"nul...?" Kili lifted an eyebrow at the word, but curled on Fili's side anyway. The past nights alone in the cold had been horrible, so the warmth of another body beside his own lulled him easily in sleep.

"Love..." He murmured quietly, yawning widely before closing his eyes and allowed sleep to claim him.

Such a quiet word, but hard to miss. Fili smiled slowly at the sound of it, his heart skipping a beat at the tiniest of confessions. For the first time in a while, he felt comforted, warm, relaxed. The tension in his shoulders melted at the feeling of Kili snuggled in close, his breath easing as dreams took hold of him.

Fili gently brushed the hair from shut eyes, and he softly nosed Kili's neck.

_Dear god... don't take this away from me._


	13. Chapter 13

Like Thorin had promised him, it didn't take them longer than two days to reach Rohan. During their time together, Kili learned more and more about the prince, his companion. What he liked, what he disliked. Sometimes even-- what turned him on. 

Not that he did anything with the information.

At least he kept telling himself that each time he played with Fili's hair perhaps a bit more harsher than simply petting it.

And Rohan was... Well, nothing like he had imagined it would be. It was large, it was full of life and it stole Kili's breath away.

"Do you really think we'll find the Wizard here?" He asked glancing at the blond briefly. "And if yes... from where, exactly?"

They arrived during the late morning, snow cleared from the entrance of the gates as they rode their mounts into the city.

The streets were a busy place, carts being pulled by large mules. They weren't spared so much as a glance as the people moved about to take care of their own business, ducking into stalls to barter for food and warmer clothes. Fili glanced around at the humans, which were a blur of faces he would likely forget later.

None of them resembled the Wanderer. And there were no obvious signs of a man too tall, too old, or a hat so large in brim and pointy that it stuck out like a sore thumb.

“West is where he told me to take you, and this is as far west as I am sure is reasonable. He must be here.” Fili said looking up at Kili. “I suppose we would check places most travelers go. Inns, bars. If I remember correctly, Tharkûn rather liked wine.”

"Then I suppose we need to check those out." Kili replied nodding slightly, gaze flicking around the city. He truly hoped they would find the Wizard, he was desperate for answers.

He smiled a bit, walking through the many taverns and bars they passed by. None of them had a man taller or older than the others, none of them could recall seeing the Wizard lately. And with each negative response he got, the more desperate he became.

"Well, there are the inns left." Kili murmured rubbing his temple. "If we can't find him, at least we can rent a room for the night."

Kili seemed to become more and more discouraged with each shake of the head, disregard, or flat out dismissal. It wasn't uncommon for men to be almost as suspicious as dwarves, to the people of Rohan they might have looked a strange pair. Asking for wizards, of all things.

It wasn't as if the Wanderer were disliked, but they still brought a bit of trouble wherever they went.

“Perhaps he hasn't arrived yet,” Fili said, giving Kili an encouraging smile. He placed a hand on his arm, squeezing it in comfort. “Give him a night or two. We can send a message in the meantime. And rest for now.”

As the journey was cold, heavy with snow on some days. Their bodies were warm beneath fur and blankets, but Fili found himself craving the feeling of a mattress and pillows.

"Suppose you're right." Kili sighed, a brief smile tugging on the corner of his lip before returning to the small frown. He felt restless, on display to just wait around like that.

He got them a room from one of the inns, requesting him to be informed if the Wizard would come by or they had heard a word of the man.

The room itself was cozy, man-sized and Kili turned to look at Fili with a teasing smile. "Need me to lift you on the chair?"

“I'm not that short,” Fili pretended to be offended, leaping up onto the edge of the mattress with ease. How soft it felt against his tired body. The blond fell back almost immediately, sighing with pleasure. “Oh, have I missed this...”

Kili looked at him fondly, kicking the shoes from his feet before joining his lover on the bed. He sunk into it with a satisfied sigh, his eyelids fluttering shut and lips curling in a smile. "Definitely better than hard ground." He agreed stretching his arms above his head.

“Oh, I don't know.” Fili's lips quirked in a small smile. “I thought you were comfortable enough.”

Many times they slept curled close, and Fili found himself awake curled up upon Kili's chest, the brunet having pulled him tight in his arms, nose pressed into his hair as he slept. The prince was oddly reminded of a small child snuggling a stuffed toy.

"Oh hush." Kili laughed nudging him gently, rolling to lay on his side facing the blond. "I didn't exactly hear you complain."

“Rather hard to speak when my face is burrowed against your neck,” Fili chuckled quietly. He grinned at Kili lazily, eyes fond. He reached out to touch the ends of the brunet's curls, gently tugging on them to make them bounce.

“It's getting quite long,” the prince murmured, slowly pulling one straight. “Almost long enough to braid...”

Kili leaned in the touch, chuckling softly at the words. "Braid? I'd look silly with a braid in my hair." He protested shaking his head a bit, gaze flitting over Fili's hair.

They suited the prince, made him look more royal and handsome in his opinion. A braid in his own hair would definitely just look silly.

“I think you would look rather good,” Fili said, tilting his own head slightly upward as he observed Kili's face, running his fingers through his hair. “With the right plaiting. If you grow it out more...”

The blond shifted a little closer, resting his hand on Kili's neck. “Perhaps I could place beads. Silver ones. Blue sapphires, lapis lazuli... moonstones.”

Kili looked surprised, the hand on his neck sending warmth through his body. "But isn't..." He frowned a bit, teeth digging on his lower lip.

"According to the book, braiding someone's hair is sacred, isn't it? It holds deeper meanings."

Fili met the man's look with his own, before laughing. “At times I forget you know so much. Our culture is secretive to people outside of it, yet we are, quite literally, an open book to you.”

The prince smiled, gently mussing Kili's hair. “They do hold meanings. Little words to describe yourself, or accomplishments. Certain plaits are used for the warriors, the noble, the smiths, the artistic. The married, the single. Some are for family. Some are for lovers. You have to forgive me,” Fili grinned sheepishly. “I offered to braid your hair, because it is something... incredibly cliché. It's like a man kissing the hand of a woman to make her blush.”

In a sense, Fili was flirting with him. And being very cheesy about it.

"So you're hoping to make me blush?" Kili asked amused, eyebrow lifted slightly as he covered Fili's hand with his own. "You're adorable and sweet. If one day you wish to braid my hair, I'd be honored to carry it." 

Counting that he was here long enough for his hair to grow. 

His gaze flicked over Fili's hair, fingers reaching out to brush through them gently. "....Think you could teach me?"

“I could,” Fili said after a moment, relaxing at the feeling of Kili's fingers slowly running through thick locks. His own braids had loosened from travel, and he had little time to care for his hair properly. “If you want to learn.”

"I wouldn't have asked if I didn't want to learn." Kili pointed out tugging on one of the loose beads, cradling it in his palm as it fell.

Fili closed his eyes at the slight pull, feeling himself shiver. Kili knew perfectly well what that did to him, how his scalp tingled pleasantly. The man found every opportunity to tug at them, just to make him squirm.

“Yes,” Fili agreed, swallowing a little. He moved to sit up, pushing his hair over his shoulders. He licked his lips, undoing the end of one of his thick braids. “I'm glad to show you, but...” he smiled slowly. “I'm afraid it won't get very far. If you keep touching my hair like that.”

"I'll try to be very, very careful." Kili replied smiling innocently, yet his eyes spoke of another story as they sparked mischievously.

He knew very well what this would do to Fili, how it would most likely turn him into a mess and well.... he liked toying with the prince, push the limits and see when he snapped.

"So, how do you start the braiding?"

Fili rolled his eyes playfully, knowing Kili wasn't going to behave in the least. He chastised him nonetheless, shaking his head. The blond undid the locks, carefully undoing a knot at the end of it between his fingers.

“My hair is a mess, unfortunately.” The prince said with a wry grin. “There is a comb in my pack. You will have to brush it out first.”

"I think I can handle that." Kili smiled reaching for Filis pack, searching through it until he found the comb.

He shifted on the bed, sitting beside the blond before starting to run the comb through his hair slowly, untangling the knots with great care so he wouldn't cause pain to the blond.

The soft raking from the teeth of the comb had Fili's shoulders sagging. The prince visibly relaxed at the feeling of it. More of his braids were loosened, gently undone, beads placed aside atop a shallow pillow for safety.

The prince tilted his head back, humming softly as Kili carefully detangled his hair until the comb ran smoothly through wavy tresses, almost silky to the touch. Fili worried his bottom lip as the teeth gently dragged over the scalp, breath hitching in his throat.

"Do you want me to make similar braids or something else?" Kili purred nipping Fili's earlobe lightly before dragging the comb against the blond's scalp carefully, just a tease.

"I think I could manage one of those three-strand braids but those are nothing fancy and honestly are kind of flat." He chuckled shaking his head.

“I...” Fili's mind clouded a little, shoulders visibly trembling from the nibble, a small noise escaping him at the tease. He shifted where he sat, turning his head to look at Kili. The prince opened his mouth to say something, but swallowed it down at the sight of the man's mischievous grin.

“It's a start,” the blond managed, trying to will down the sudden heat to his cheeks. “Start at... start at the scalp, and weave it as you know how.”

It was always as interesting to see the otherwise composed prince lose his cool and get flustered.

Kili's lips curled in a satisfied smirk as he started to weave the braid on the side of Fili's head, tugging now and then on 'accident' and always mumbling a teasing apology after it.

He was doing it on purpose. Every pull, slight tug, a slow drag of the nail to gather more tresses. They weren't hard, and added just the right amount of pressure. The prince was biting the inside of his cheek, face flushing scarlet. He knew he was red because of the vanity mirror off to the side, and he could see the smug look on Kili's face.

The prince took in a breath through his nose, biting back a soft mewl as Kili once again gently pulled upon his hair. Oh it was torture, sweet, blissful torture.

"There, now you have a very lame three-strand braid. Now what?" Kili asked chuckling softly as he tugged lightly on the braid. 

He enjoyed pulling these reactions out of Fili, enjoyed seeing the flush on his face grow darker, lips raw from biting them to keep the noises at bay.

Fili felt as if his nerves were alight, desire burning hot in his belly from the constant tease. His scalp was sore, but tingling pleasantly, the braid tight and hanging heavy just over his ear. The prince shifted again, fingers having curled into the sheets. He leaned back against Kili's chest, desiring closeness. It did little to actually ease his wants.

“A... a moment...” the prince murmured closing his eyes, attempting to calm himself.

Kili looked amused at the prince, the way his cheeks were flushed and lips parted as he fought the compose himself.

"Feeling weakened?" He asked teasingly, brushing his fingers from the other hand through Fili's hair, curling them around his finger.

He was doing this on purpose, the prince knew it to be so. 

“Y-you aren't helping,” Fili moaned quietly, leaning his head back into the touch, heavy against Kili's chest. “You know exactly what this does to me...”

How Kili made him want with such a simple act. Soft pets over his head, fingernails dragging slowly over his scalp. The blond was practically writhing, breath picking up in short pants.

"Admit it, if you knew my weak spot, you would use it all the time as well." Kili pointed out grinning, fingers scratching their way down Fili's neck as the prince rested his head against his chest.

"Come on, focus. What do I need to do next?" He asked teasingly, tugging on the braid. "I cannot leave it like this."

“Not so cruelly,” Fili laughed, worrying his lower lip to keep from mewling. He closed his eyes, placing his hand over Kili's to still his touches. “Let me... I can't think if you keep doing that. Please...”

He took in a few deep breaths, visibly shuddering at the pleasant feeling running from his scalp, down the back of his neck and to the base of his spine. 

“... when the braid is finished, bead the ends.” Fili swallowed, reaching for the ends of his hair. “Loop it like this...” he wrapped it around his finger, creating a small loop before folding the end through. “Like knotting a rope, but don't pull to tightly, or I will tangle. The bead should weight it down.”

Kili, while amused by Fili's reactions, watched with interest as the prince showed him just how he should close the braids. He took over for Fili then, picking up one of the beads an looped the braid through and around it.

His fingers traced the carvings on the bead before his lips curled in another smirk. "Turn around, need to do the other side."

Giving Kili a bit of a incredulous look, Fili carefully turned himself around, shifting a little on his thighs.

“Behave,” the prince warned, his face burning hot. The blond looked towards his knees, red cheeked.

Fili felt strangely vulnerable, trembling as he felt Kili touch the ends again. It was gentle at first, as if the brunet had finally started to listen to him. The prince slowly started to relax.

Kili's smile softened as he worked on the second braid in Fili's hair, pressing a soft kiss on the side of his neck. "If I truly tease you too much, just tell me so." He murmured softly, closing the braid with the bead carefully before pulling back a bit.

"I don't want you to feel uncomfortable around me." He didn't want to harm the prince, he merely got himself lost in the way the other reacted to his touch, his teasing. It felt nearly intoxicating to have such power over the blond.

“I'm not,” Fili said immediately, lifting his head. He glanced back at Kili, worrying his lower lip. “I feel perfectly safe with you, Kili. It's just that I... when you pull it, it feels good.” Almost too good, to a near embarrassing extent. “I like it when my head is touched. When you comb your fingers through my hair. I just become...”

Aroused. So very, very aroused. Fili swallowed down the words he wanted to speak, face flushing scarlet at the unspoken admission. His usual confident demeanor was lost on him, his body feeling warm. So he squared his shoulders, looking at the wall firmly, heaving in a deep breath.

“I start to want.” Fili said finally. “I become so.. desperate. Its such a strange place to touch, but it lights fire beneath my skin.”

"It's not strange." Kili replied immediately, fingers curling against Fili's chin and tilted his head up so he could peck his nose, then his lips briefly.

"A lot of people get turned on by that. Some people even stuff that's a lot weirder than hair pulling." His smile was gentle, understanding, as he brushed his fingers through Fili's hair gently. "I'm never going to make fun of it. I think it's pretty hot." He admitted grinning, kissing him again.

Fili blinked in confusion at the compliment. Strangely, the phrases still made the prince feel warm in the cheeks. And Kili looked at him so fondly, and kissed him so sweetly. The blond's eyelashes fluttered closed, mouth going slack as Kili affectionately nibbled on his lips.

“Thank you,” he murmured, easing a knot that coiled in his gut. He returned Kili's grin with a soft smile.

Kili smiled against Fili's lips, picking up one of the two beads still lying on the pillow and grinned. "Come on then, we still have two braids to make." he teased lightly, starting to braid the third one on Fili's hair.

The prince nodded, and allowed Kili to finish braiding his hair. Give or take a few tugs, and blunt nails gently dragging. Fili's resolve slowly melted, and he found it harder and harder to keep still. Or quiet, for that matter.

He was straining against his trousers now, groin aching from the attentions Kili gave him. Fili made a rather pathetic noise when the brunet pulled away to admire his handiwork, gently touching the three-strands with the tips of his fingers.

Fili fought to keep himself breathing even, his heart pounding in his chest. He cursed this weakness, finally turning around to face the other. He took hold of Kili's shoulders, pulling him close for another kiss. 

"Still one left." Kili chuckled nipping Fili's lip teasingly, sucking on it lightly. "Think you can handle it?" He asked lifting an eyebrow, his other hand sliding down cupping his growing erection with his palm.

"Look at you." He cooed pressing a kiss on Fili's neck, biting the skin hard enough to bruise and licked the mark briefly before sliding his fingers back in Fili's hair.

“I can't...” Fili gasped. Another swear left him, broken khuzdul, shuddering moans as Kili sucked and bit at his skin, soothing the pressure with his tongue. “Mahal, I can't, Kili—”

He trembled against the human's bigger frame, digging his own nails into the brunet's shoulders. Gods he wanted it, he wanted it badly, to the point of his arousal near being unbearable. Still Kili tortured him, touching his hair, pulling gently, scratching at the skin, making his nerves tingle and his cock throb painfully.

Kili hushed him quietly, fingers continuing to comb through Fili's hair as they worked in the last braid. His nails scratched and massaged Fili's scalp, curling around the root of his hair pulling his head back before descending his lips back on the prince's.

"There, now they are all there." He murmured wrapping Fili's leg around his waist, pressing down against the blond.

The blond let out a noise akin to a whimper, clutching at Kili's tunic. God, that felt good, the gentle pressure. It had him moaning, body squirming against the brunet's. Fili urged him closer, practically pulling the human atop him for another kiss. Desperate, messy, unrefined, a reflection of Fili's current heated state.

The prince was a mess, mouth parted as he let out heated breath, hair splayed out over the sheets. Fili arched closer, rolling his hips forward for contact. Anything, anything to ease the ache. 

“Please...” Fili murmured, looking at Kili beneath his lashes. “Please Kili...”

Kili cursed quietly at the way the prince begged, heat rising on his cheeks as he ground his hips down harder, eliciting a soft cry from his own lips.

His fingers fisted in Fili's hair, tipping his head back as he returned his lips back on the prince's neck, working more marks on the already abused skin. 

"What do you need?" He murmured turning his head to catch Fili's ear between his teeth. "Need me to touch you? Stroke you? Maybe I'll keep tugging your hair until you soil your pants."

Fili cried out, clutching at the sheets. He near sobbed at the grip, the pressure on his neck adding to the sensations that seemed to be everywhere. He was blinded by lust, by want, body greedy for pleasure.

“Gods, anything-- anything...!” The prince near sobbed, rutting up against Kili's body, meeting the brunet's hips with his own. “Touch me, taste me, fuck me-- kahomhîlizu Kili-uh-- I need it, I need _you_ , Kili, please--” 

He was babbling now, begging, desperate with want and burning desire. He was shameless to his lusts, to the feeling of overwhelming whirl of how needy he had become.

Kili hushed him gently, not wanting to overwhelm the prince to the point he could be harmed. "You'll get it, been so good all evening." He promised pressing a kiss on the panting lips before unlacing the strings on Fili's trousers and tugged them down.

He nearly moaned at the sight that greeted him-- Fili's cock was hard, purple around the head and positively _leaking_ already. It had stained the inside of his breeches and Kili bit his lip before leaning down and wrapped them around the head of his cock, sucking greedily.

Heat, pleasurable welcoming heat. Wet and soft, tongue gliding, saliva and precome mingling. Oh gods, the pressure, the touch-- Fili was keening, moans broken.

The blond clutched at the sheets, grasping at the comforter bunched up near his ears. He shut his lids tight, eyes almost rolling to the back of his head at the feeling of Kili's silky mouth enveloping his cock. The prince let out a choked noise, pleasure and a brief feeling of relief making him tremble.

He wouldn't last long, he knew. The prince was worked up to a state of blinding bliss, already so close, thighs shaking, heart hammering hard in his chest, hips jerking upward.

Kili choked slightly, swallowing instinctively around Fili's cock as the other kept pushing it deeper in his mouth. He sucked eagerly, tongue lapping around and against the slit, hoping to hear more of the broken moans Fili let out.

His fingers kept petting Fili's waist, holding him closer, eyes squeezing shut.

Cracked sounds of pleasure fell from Fili's lips, the prince's words lost in gasps and heady moans of utter ecstasy. His hips rolled forward, hands moving over his own body, chest, stomach, until his fingers curled into Kili's hair. He held on tight, body spasming, jerking as he reached his pique, and fell hastily over the edge.

Fili felt fresh tears on his face, wrecked noises becoming a little high pitched as he shuddered near violently as he spilled. He curled closer to Kili's mouth, hips stuttering unsteadily into the heat of him. His lover only seemed to swallow him deeper, taking in his seed hungrily, pressure a constant as he drank him in.

The prince sobbed openly, the familiar feeling of orgasm following the first like a series of waves. It left the blond blindsided, body unsteady. He couldn't anchor himself, as tightly as he held onto Kili. He begged, and begged, his own words lost and incoherent to his own ears.

Kili groaned as Fili spilled, greedily drinking the bitter come, coaxing the prince to give him more, give him everything. The hands gripping his hair made his breath hitch, his own fingers digging on Fili's hips as he took him deeper, swallowed again around him.

Despite having just come, the prince seemed desperate for more, body jerking and curling, choked pleads falling from his lips.

It sent hot white arousal through Kili's body, lips wrapping tighter around Fili's cock as he pressed his tongue back against the slit, rubbing it steadily, coaxing more of the liquid to drip on his tongue.

Kili was going to kill him, the sensations leaving the prince entirely broken apart. Fili could only writhe helplessly, knees curled, body unsure of whether to jerk back or forward into the intoxicating heat of the brunet's mouth. 

Fili was oversensitive, nerves singing and tingling, sensations overwhelming him. But god he didn't want it to end, even as it started to hurt. The blond whimpered, turning his head, mouth hanging open. He threw his head back at the sudden feeling of Kili digging his tongue against the twitching slit, wringing out another wave of pleasure.

The man was milking him dry, and Fili felt he couldn't spill anything more, even as Kili coaxed another climax from him, one that left the blond shattered. 

“Kili--” Fili sobbed, voice wrecked. “Gods I can't-- I can't anymore-- please--”

As soon as the words left Fili's lips, Kili pulled off carefully, cleaning the stained skin with care. He wiped his lips on the back of his hand, eyes taking in greedily the sight before him-- the flushed skin, the parted lips, tears leaking from Fili's eyes.

With a soft noise he crawled up to the blond, wiping the tears away before pressing his lips on Fili's forehead. His arm slid around Fili's waist holding him close, offering him comfort as he whispered soothing words in the prince's ear.

Fili curled close to Kili's chest, pressing his face against the brunet's neck. He clung tightly, body wracked with tremors. The human comforted him with soft words, his hands gently rubbing his back and shoulders. 

He could barely calm himself even then, burrowing as close as he could, taking in deep breaths, Kili's scent and his warmth.

It was some time before the prince could lift his head again, cheeks stained with tear streaks. He offered Kili a weak smile, eyes fond.

“I think you've ruined me,” he said, voice hoarse.

"As long as it's a good type of ruining." Kili murmured softly, tracing his finger down Fili's chin, tilting his head up to press a soft kiss on his lips. "You're beautiful." He said softly, resting their foreheads together gently.

“I'm a mess,” Fili chuckled, nuzzling Kili's nose. “No one's ever... done that to me.”

He had his fair share of partners, some pleasurable, some not. No one took advantage of the things Fili enjoyed during bed sport. His hair being pulled, the ability to break apart more than once. Fili was always fairly in control, but to be played with in such a way, to be reduced to nothing but a mound of intense heat and wrecked sobs-- it was strangely freeing to let someone past his barriers.

“I think my bones are jelly,” Fili grinned.

"It's a good thing you don't have to move this night." Kili laughed softly, relieved to see that his actions hadn't harmed Fili in any way. He held the blond close, nudging their noses together and whispering sweet nothings just to hear him laugh or see his cheeks flush.

Fili smiled slowly, reduced to soft giggles as Kili murmured quiet praises, little compliments, or whispered how lovely he looked in passion. The blond did find his cheeks growing hot, his blush dusting his cheeks pink and deepening in color.

He kissed Kili then, something soft and slow. Searching and gentle. Fili's body felt good, but his heart felt better. Warm, and alight with deep love. He ran a hand through Kili's hair, pushing soft curls behind his ear.

“Men lananubukhs menu,” Fili murmured against his lips.

"Men..." Kili frowned a bit, fingers massaging the nape of Fili's neck gently. He didn't understand the words, but they were spoken with such softness that he had a feeling he knew what Fili meant.

He was afraid to love. He couldn't handle it if something was to happen to the prince. He knew they would have to find the Wizard, and on day soon he would be gone from this world, from his beloved prince. They were thoughts he didn't wish to think about, and pushed them quickly in the back of his mind. For now, he could enjoy the dwarf's company.

With a soft peck on Fili's lips, he drew the blond closer. "I love you too."

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I will most likely be doing a sequel for this later, see where the boys end up to~


End file.
